There once was an actor named Will
Who was punished for slapping, until
He thought “I’ll never be arrested
“If they knew I molested
“And trafficked minors for capitol hill!”
Tag Archives: Epstein
Assault? Blacklist Him! Sex Slavery? Let’s Let Him Slide Quietly Out Of The Public Eye (Yay Hollywood)
Filed under Poems
In Recent News…
There once was a Peruvian prince
Who wore a gold pair of nez pince.
He said “I have seen
“Info about Jeff Epstein,”
And no one has heard from him since…
Filed under Poems
Wanna Hang Out?
I said “If”
She said, “Did I tell you about…”
I said “You”
She said “The time I had the doubt…”
I said “Don’t”
“About whether or not…”
I said “Shut”
“This eyeliner makes me hot…”
I said “Up”
“‘Cause I, like, wasn’t totally sure…”
I said “I”
“If this was chic or, like, couture…”
I said “Will”
“So I called my BFF…”
I said “Do”
“And was like, ‘Sup, my broseph…”
I said “What”
“And he was like, ‘Oh girl…”
I said “Epstein”
“That shade of ivory makes me hurl…”
I said “Didn’t.”
She would stop,
Or so I thought;
She kept talking;
I did not.
I hung around;
She tied the knot.
Filed under Poems
Legolas and Pitiless
There are lots of similarities
Between Epstein and Tolkien’s elves:
Both hang around with youngsters
And neither of them kill themselves.
The Daily Travesty 