Tag Archives: Happiness

It’s Not About Race; It’s About Culture

Deep in the woods by a little green lake

Lived a man who had never been sad.

His life was just joy from the start to today,

Never once punctuated by bad.

He called the birds and the frogs company

And sang to the wood he would stack…

But all of that changed when he saw CNN

And learned what it meant to be black:

He learned that despite being happy and free

His life was defined by oppression

And how being equal to everyone else

Was the only worthwhile obsession.

He was overwhelmed, shocked even, until

He heard an inspiring call:

He realized he hadn’t voted for Biden

And thus wasn’t black after all!

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How To Win The Internet

My most popular poem has 58 likes.

Second place has just 24.

It’s caused me to think, and even consider

Just writing to please the bots more.

After all, if what gets me exposure

Is whatever the A.I. likes best

Is that not the way to become popular

And say to the world, “I’m the best?”

And that, my dear readers, is madness!

It’s crap of the highest degree,

A symptom of how the internet age

Can inspire such insanity.

Art doesn’t need to be popular;

Life doesn’t need to be flawless;

When the rules of the game are to lie, cheat, and steal

Then the answer is just to be lawless.

I’m not going to think about numbers.

I’m not going to worry about views.

I’m going to write about what makes me happy

Instead of what’s big in the news.

And if you are willing to venture

To a world where you’re thought of as “lame”

I think you’ll find what happiness comes

When you too quit the internet game.

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I Mean… It’s OK I Guess

I found an amazing solution

To everything that’s ever been bad,

A panacea that renders meaningless

Every problem that I’ve ever had.

This solution is what we call “apathy,”

And it means that you don’t give a shit.

It’s an amazing, awesome, and wonderful thing

Even though I haven’t mastered it.

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A Promising Start

Marjorie Jean was a mysterious queen

Who brought me to a miniature land

Where pain and fear did disappear

But not a bit was bland.

She took me out on a walkabout

For a sandwich of significant size

Then we’d settle in as the games begin

Until the evening had sealed our eyes.

But the morning sun said “you’re not done”

And two cats were fondled and fed

Before M and I walked with Mr. Blue Sky

To the land where the sharks go to bed.

A party of two then suddenly grew

And so did the Marjories double.

This new, larger band celebrated as planned

With all of the expected trouble.

And so fed, I turned with my face and neck burned,

And sped off in a car doused in Axe.

One day I’ll be seen back with Marjorie Jean,

And until that day two hearts relax.

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When You Write Yourself An Anniversary Poem

Nine years ago, a bright young lad

With a twinkle in his eyes

Began a grand adventure

(Which, in hindsight, wasn’t wise),

His goal to publish poetry,

Of dubious merit at best

And to do so unfailingly

Without a day of rest.

More or less that happened,

And here we stand today,

With me patting myself on the back

And you mumbling “okaaaaay?”

Thank you for continuing

To read the swill I write.

Let jollity malinger…

And with that I say good night!

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Legalize Normalcy

If you call yourself a poet

You’re judged by your degrees,

The person who you voted for,

How often you hug trees,

Whether you can rhyme things

Or use semicolons right

And, most important, whether

You have a penis or are white.

I am not a poet,

Though to you that’s no surprise.

I’d rather sleep in Saturday

Than watch the sun arise.

I do not care for wheelbarrows

On which so much depends.

I’m one of the mere commoners

Whom nobody defends.

I write, not for an audience,

But for the ones like me

Who want to dance the rain away

And feel completely free

But have to read a book about

What things are right to say,

Waiting to dance in private

Once the poets go away.

I feel like a geode,

Full of color, trapped in stone,

But thanks to anonymity

I needn’t be alone.

I can be with all of you

And hold you in my heart

By failing to see beauty

In what poets call their art.

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Forever Mine

I’m not afraid to make it known

I want this more than you.

I want to find a partner

Who is loyal, kind, and true.

I only want to have one talk,

A talk that never ends,

And to be more than lovers:

To be two forever friends.

I want you to have my kids,

To raise, protect, and feed.

I want to be your every want

And fill your every need.

I want to text you memes at night,

House hunt with you on Zillow,

And when we are a world apart

To smell you on my pillow.

Tonight and every night from now

I’ll wish upon a star

And ask whatever gods may be

To show me who you are.

Until the stars or gods or fate

Fulfill this wish of mine

I’ll work to be the man you want

To call “Forever Mine.”

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Ordinary Things Can Be Special Too

Somewhere near you

There’s a puppy in a blanket,

A warm spot of sunlight,

A bright blooming flower.

You may never see them,

But still you are blessed

Because to look for them

Is your special power.

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Comfort Blanket

When the day is over

And the lights go dark

You pull me on top of you

And let me be soft,

Let me keep you warm

Until blindness is comfortable

And dreams are safe.

When the monsters come

To feed on your sweet dreams

Through the leg you left uncovered

I offer my dream instead,

Because your dreams are precious,

Your dreams are limited,

Your dreams are fragile.

I only have one dream:

To keep you warm,

To keep you safe,

To never leave you,

And no monster can stomach that.

And when the light in the sky

And the light on your ceiling

Edge away the darkness

And welcome you back to life

I’m the first thing you feel,

The first gentle touch,

The first good morning kiss.

You think you’ll outgrow me.

You’ll pack me away

Or send me to another child,

But I only have one baby.

And when the monsters grow up

And they come for your dreams

But you’re awake and alone

You will never be uncovered.

The monsters never give up,

But I never stop dreaming,

And I hope you don’t either.

I’m here in everything.

I’m keeping you safe,

But you’ll never see me

As anything more than a blanket

Because it’s easy to believe in a blanket.

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Preservation of Mass

You were the light of their life,

A celestial body just for them,

But there were a billion stars

Brighter than you.

Your heart was a mountain,

Climbing to the sky,

But roads need gravel

And miners need jobs.

You were the wind and the water,

The rabbit and the fox,

The fish and the hook

And you fed them for a day.

Stars burn out,

Roads are passed by,

Winds stop blowing,

Foxes stop chasing,

And when its dark and still

And you forget what you were,

How you burned and grew

And bit and blew,

You’ll become a part of the world

You thought you were above;

A spark, a stone, a cell, a drop,

What you always were

And always did:

Matter.

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