We’ve finally reached the fated day
Where your date presents a resume
And you have to ask her in detail
About the gap in her experience as a female
Tag Archives: Life
She Played Another Game With Me…
Her epic trapper spidey
Killed my supersonic bat-dragon.
Apparently the divorce is off
And we’re back to love and naggin’!
Filed under Poems
And You Thought Monopoly Ruined Friendships…
My magic thunder doggy
Killed my fiancee’s fairy horse.
Yes, she played Pokemon with me.
Yes, we’re headed for divorce.
Filed under Poems
Rainbow Town
Big green steamboat
With two red wheels
Casting great white wakes
In the chocolate Mississippi water.
In the distance, a brick-red city
With lights in tans and teals
And the iron evening air
Is growing blacker, hotter.
The brassy blast of cymbals
And a wailing silver sax
Play the blues for our reunion
And the clouds are stalwart brown.
I’m sitting in a steel chair
With rust like sealing wax
As a snowy egret flies into
The night in rainbow town.
Filed under Poems
Travel Traditions
I flew on a plane to New Orleans
And by now you know what that means:
I’m probably tired, and pleased to report
That this poem is late and also is short.
Filed under Poems
PG-All Ages
Sometimes the things you grew up with
Can make you feel good
Like riding bikes and Pokemon
And being misunderstood
But when you grow, perspectives change
And you see a world in pain
And it can’t be changed by touching base
Or building the best paper plane.
You see a world with real struggles
And problems with no answer
And you decide to try something
Like curing AIDS or cancer.
But as perspectives change, I think
Some problems would be solved
If more people bought a new five-speed
Or cared how monsters were evolved.
Growing up is nice and all
But never you forget
The world needs childish grownups too
For poetry and… stuff.
Filed under Poems
Another Night Of D&D
There once was a skeezy Paladin,
A sly assassin, a cheesy bard,
A moon priestess, an archer,
And they rolled the dice real hard.
They stopped a civil war of trolls
And saved a duke from bombs of magic
And they lived happily ever after
(Which is the opposite of tragic).
Filed under Poems
Lessons in Fine Dining
Life’s like an Oreo cookie:
The start and the end are both crappy
But the more stuff you put in the middle
The more likely you are to be happy!
Filed under Poems
Burning Flags
Many a child was inspired by a flag
To leave home on a bus and return in a bag,
To struggle and clash with another boy who
Was raised by a flag without red, white, or blue.
It may be a purpose to live under fire
Until you return or in glory expire,
But I seek a purpose where no flags will fly
And a world where no child is inspired to die.
Filed under Poems
Or Am I Just Forgetful?
Today it is early.
Last night it was late.
Does my lack of a poem
Mean I had a good date?
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 