If your gums don’t bleed
You aren’t pressing hard enough.
Do it every night.
Tag Archives: Short
#LiterallySatan
War is pretty bad.
Epstein didn’t kill himself.
Can we get taxed less?
Filed under Poems
NFL Day One
There was a QB from Seattle
Who started a climactic battle
And then he was down
And that makes me frown
But we hope it’s not more than a rattle
…
There was a Seattle defense
With stats that just didn’t make sense.
They took the ball away
Then they took it away
Then they took it again
And the Patriots haven’t smiled since.
Filed under Poems
“No”, Said Chad The Juror
So if you’re crazy
And you do some crazy crimes
You’re just innocent?
Filed under Poems
Bump. Set. Spike! Oops…
Everything is fun
‘Til the ball goes in the stands
And a nose dissolves…
Filed under Poems
Ode To My Brain After The First Day Of School
Repeat after me:
Just because the door says push
Doesn’t mean don’t pull.
Filed under Poems
The Superhero Genre
Look! It’s a bad guy!
Let’s get punched a lot and then
Save the day again!
Filed under Poems
We’re From The Government And We’re Here To Help
There once was a system that worked
Which made administrative ears be perked
So they followed the scoop
And in they did swoop
And the system’s officially gurked.
Filed under Poems
When In Rome (Or The Dangers Of Conformity)
I think Italians
Must have problems with their kids
Jumping off bridges
Filed under Poems
