Tag Archives: Short

Watch Out

I saw a sign while driving home

That said “Watch for Children At Play.”

Although inconvenient to not know the time

I made the trade anyway.

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Season 8

Roses are red.

Violets are blue.

I put as much effort into this poem

As the Game of Thrones writers would’ve.

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It’s Awkward When Someone Says “Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace”

When a man has nothing to say

He waits in silence for the silence to end.

When a girl I like has nothing to say

She says “That’s so nice, but I have a boyfriend.”

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She Did Not Laugh Throatily

She asked me for a diamond necklace.

I gave her a diamond whose shoulders touch its head.

She asked me for a diamond necklace

But I gave her a diamond neckless instead.

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Trouble In Baltimore

My child asked me this morning

“If hitting is bad,

“How come people hit baseballs?”

Then he flew away.

I later discovered

He was not my child at all.

It was an oriole in disguise.

His sudden aversion to hitting

Makes sense now.

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College

I am a man who likes the curves

On my preferred Madames,

But better still is having curves

On my final exams.

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This Poem > Green New Deal

Onions are the only things

That make their murderers cry.

We should all wear clothes made of onions

And all murder would go bye-bye.

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