My forehead is sunburnt
And peeling a bit.
My wife, for some reason,
Is playing with it,
Peeling my flesh off
With childish glee
And I love that I found someone
Weirder than me.
Tag Archives: Silly
There Can Only Be One…
If you ever feel inferior
Be glad it’s not your fate
To be one of the walls in China
That never will be great.
Filed under Poems
Haiku for my Sister-In-Law
I have zero friends
Because other people suck
And I’m funnier
Filed under Poems
When You Think Of A Tongue Twister, But Have To Justify It With Some Kind Of Narrative ‘Cause You Write A Poetry Blog, Not A Tongue-Twister Channel
I remember being baffled
When I was a little tyke
Because the little axolotls
Looked an awful lot alike
And the axolotl likeness
Made me trip over my tongue;
“A lot of little axolotls look a lot alike”
Is hard to say when you are young.
Filed under Poems
Jazz
I’ve got a great idea
For a really catchy song.
We’ll play the tune for the first minute
But it’s eleven minutes long
So the rest of it will be me
Playing a random sexy lick
Until you forget that you were listening…
Yeah, that’ll do the trick!
Filed under Poems
Frodo’s Notes In The Margin
“Bring the ring to Mordor, kid”
Gandalf told me and so I did.
It caused me scars that forever linger,
Mostly that I can’t give Gandalf the finger.
Filed under Poems
How Little Things Change
In the days when Jesus walked the Earth
Many people had names
More akin to Shaniqua and Carston
Than Luke, Mary, Joseph, or James.
Those people lived lives that were normal and happy
But long since forgotten to time;
No one wrote a hymn for Shaniqua
Because it was too hard to rhyme.
Filed under Poems
Or Did The Fact They Never Heated Up Mean The Prophecy Came True After All?
Somebody said to the NFL
“You gotta cool your jets”.
Alas, the Jets were never cool
Not unlike marionettes.
Filed under Poems
Harry Potter And The One Minute Of Missing Footage
Christmas at Hogwarts, 1997:
Harry Potter is in heaven
Opening gifts from his first ever friends
And hoping this day never ends
When off to the side he notices one
Nondescript little package and opens it. Fun!
Inside is a cloak made of magical paper
For invisible movement during a caper.
“How does it work?” Harry asked. Ron, compliant,
Said, “It’s made from the list of all Epstein’s clients.”
Then Harry nodded, his heart feeling zen,
And Professor Quirrel was never seen again.
Filed under Poems
Who Needs AI When You Have A Wife?
No AC?
Just live under a tree.
It’s cool as can be.
Just wait and see!
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 