A princess was stolen by dragons
Some hundreds of eons ago
And instead of waiting to be slain
The dragons just stir-fried the hoe.
The kingdom saved money on dresses
And a new sense of peace was acquired.
The dragons had balls, which meant
That dancing at balls ain’t required.
The knights stopped jousting each other
For no prizes were there to be won,
And the taxes went down, people made fewer gowns,
And the populace had lots of fun.
When you don’t have to pay for a princess
How happy the white knights can get.
The only downside is the dragons
Whose tummies have gotten upset.
If I get a pet dragon
(For business or for kicks)
I’ll hide it in my dungeon
And prob’ly call it Trix.
I’ll feed it little children
To give it a dragon’s fix,
But mostly for the privilege of saying
“Silly rabbit, kids are for Trix!”
The dragon did think
It’d be cool to have ink
And so decided, “what the heck?”
The jungle cat, too,
Got a tattoo
Of a human on it’s neck.
To be man with aspirations
Of power, wealth, and fame
Is just to be a failed dragon.
Here, let me explain:
A dragon spends its day
Making money and making noise
And sits in its lair in the evening
Counting billions of new toys.
If a human does the same
And becomes a zillionaire
He still won’t be a dragon.
The dragon says “so there.”
A chicken met a dragon
One Friday afternoon.
The chicken told the dragon
“I wish I looked like you.”
Then the dragon ate the chicken
‘Cause that’s what dragons do.
I will never forget
That first field trip to the zoo.