I read a study recently
Where folks read poetry
Written both by poets
And impostor GPTs.
The funny part is readers
Rated all the AI stuff
Better in every category
Than the real poets’ fluff.
The only metric humans
Could equal AI at
Was the “originality” category.
Can you imagine that?
So, yes, robots are winning
But I’ll peacefully nap
Knowing I still have a stranglehold
On writing strictly crap.
For those interested: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-024-76900-1
Filed under Poems
We’ve reached the point in Monopoly
Where all the property’s gone
And one rich guy is making
Everybody else a pawn
So why are we surprised
When the thimbles of the world
Decide it’s time the tables flipped
And wads of cash get hurled?
Filed under Poems
To all of you who laughed at me
When I said “Dragons are real”
I present you: California.
Now how do you feel?
Filed under Poems
If your Weiner is white
Or your Weiner is black
You’ll be alright.
I’ll cut you some slack;
If your Weiner is red
Or your Weiner is yellow
You might have a problem.
But I know a fellow!
Filed under Poems
Whenever I start hating humans
I remember that someone created
A cup that spins knives in the bottom
That cut food as its electrically gyrated
And it makes a smooth mixture of flavors
From fruits, sugar, protein, et cetera.
Sure, some people still put veggies in
But it still makes you feel better, huh?
Filed under Poems
With the recent rise of terrorism
And assassination attempts, please
Remember it was Robert Selander (Mastercard CEO)
Who invented “Convenience Fees”.
Filed under Poems
In the near future, diversity quotas
Will become even harder to fill
So job interviewers will have to start meetings
With, “Hey, so I see you are Bill
“But if you’ll let us call you Simone during work
“And you’ll say that your pronouns are ‘they’
“Then we’re happy to call you our newest employee.
“Otherwise, have a very nice day.”
Filed under Poems
Today I went back to work
And I had an amazing day
That was absolutely fantastic
In every single way!
I got paid well and my colleagues
Are fine, upstanding folks
And I’m sharing this with you
So I don’t get fired for writing jokes.
Filed under Poems
My wife is ultradorable
And superfect as well.
I think she’s megawesome
And my only fear is she’ll
Come home with a horse one day
That she was drunkenjoying
Because, although she’s gigamazing,
She can be equestriannoying.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 