Tag Archives: Inside Joke

The Ballad of Yargh

Once in the land of Kibosh

In the castle between worlds

Was the mighty warrior, Yargh,

And the dice he deftly hurled.

He gambled with the gnomes and elves

And other clever fey

But lightning struck and Yargh’s great luck

Won the money and the day.

A fighter yes, so strong and bold

With blood as cold as ice

But we sing not of his prowess

With the blade, but of the dice.

So sing of Yargh the fortunate,

The winner of our game.

His only lack of luck is that

His parents chose that name.

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Never Again

To my one and only who left me to cry

Just a month after love in the month of July:

I hope in my heart you are happy and well

Though I know I won’t see you again!

To the one whom I sang to by river and trail

Without even a thought that our kinship could fail:

I hope in my heart that you’re singing right now

With a voice I’ll hear never again!

To the one I confided in joy and in pain,

Whom I kissed on a bridge in the darkness and rain:

I hope in my heart that you’ll never be lonely

Though I’ll never caress you again!

To the heart that you broke that is healing tonight

I promise you’ll once again feel alright!

I hope you keep hoping and loving forever,

For hoping for love is a worthy endeavor,

And because you loved once you’ll be light as a feather

Even if you love never again!

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A Promising Start

Marjorie Jean was a mysterious queen

Who brought me to a miniature land

Where pain and fear did disappear

But not a bit was bland.

She took me out on a walkabout

For a sandwich of significant size

Then we’d settle in as the games begin

Until the evening had sealed our eyes.

But the morning sun said “you’re not done”

And two cats were fondled and fed

Before M and I walked with Mr. Blue Sky

To the land where the sharks go to bed.

A party of two then suddenly grew

And so did the Marjories double.

This new, larger band celebrated as planned

With all of the expected trouble.

And so fed, I turned with my face and neck burned,

And sped off in a car doused in Axe.

One day I’ll be seen back with Marjorie Jean,

And until that day two hearts relax.

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A Courteous Reply To Billy Joel

I know you want me to sing you a song

‘Cause you’re feeling okey-dokey.

But I don’t sing. I’m the Piano Man.

Why don’t y’all go and sing Karaoke?

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Econ 400, Minute 1

Via obfuscatory principles
And derivative pomp
It is my imperative to greet you
To my academic romp,

Wherein the equilibrium,
Elasticities, and curves
Shall give M. Night Shyamalan
Envy of my topical swerves.

I do hope to saturate you
In the ways of Bayes and Nash
While displaying free-market principles
By trading good grades for cash.

Please infer your syllabus,
Or you shan’t this lecture win.
Now, like a prisoner’s dilemma,
To start, we must begin…

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He Chased Wild Geese

Did you hear the tale
Of the bulldog named Krupp?
If you have, crazy huh?
If not, look it up.

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The Oregon Trail (Last post for a while)

I’m headin’ down South on the oregon trail,

So this poem is my last

For one long week, but cry not friends,

I’m sure it’ll go by fast.


I just hope we do not have

To ford a river crossing,

And that we don’t get dysentery

And can continue flossing.


And should our wagon wheel break

We’ll fix it by ourselves,

‘Cause trading with Indians is not politically correct,

And we can’t trade with elves.


And should we die along the way

We get to leave a tombstone

That tells others who come this way

That we did meet our doom-stone.


So farewell to those whose childhood

Was full of these Oregonian fails.

For those of you who don’t understand,

Here’s a link, and happy trails!

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