I played in a band today
In a red jacket to everyone’s dismay.
The jacket was so sparkly bright
We really did play alright.
I just did two more lines
And now I’m going to do my wife’s behinds.
Tag Archives: Life
Stay
You’ve gotta go
To go see a show
That a small town like me can’t provide.
You’ve dreamed of a start
That’s a lifetime apart
From how I make you feel inside.
Your castle awaits
Where a panel of fates
Wants to hear of your fall fashion line.
I’ll help with your coat
And row over the moat
All while insisting I’m fine.
When you came along
And we started our song
We both knew one day it would end.
I dreamed of five-one
But you dreamed of more fun
So I tell people you’re just a friend.
I hope your sunsets
Are as good as it gets
And your kingdom will kneel and bow
While at the same time
It feels like a crime
That I want to say “stay” anyhow.
Filed under Poems
Now THAT Is A Great Value
This ten minute break
Isn’t long enough to write
More than a Haiku.
But I’m not an ass!
I’ll reward you with not one
Haiku, but with two!
Filed under Poems
On Quality Time and Intrusive Thoughts
I’m sitting in my dining room
Eating a pomegranate
While my wife paints a model horse
On this most peaceful planet.
As I bite into the sweet
And sour seeds, I mull:
Is this how happy zombies feel
When they bite that perfect skull?
Filed under Poems
Jacques Strap? (Comment A Better Title… I Dare You)
They called me “french-fry fingers”
‘Cause I’m just that bad at bowling.
See, oil gets all over the ball
After it starts a rolling.
Then it hits the bowling pins
And knocks down one or two.
Emotionally salty, physically oily,
And that’s why. Comprenez-vous?
Filed under Poems
Gotta Bring Back The Traditions!
A month has past since wedded bliss
And yet again it comes to this:
It’s long past my correct bed time
So I give you a four line poem and a rhyme.
Filed under Poems
When It’s November 1st And You’re On Your Lunch Break But Have To Keep A Promise To Your 16-Year-Old Self
Hello Dear Reader!
I am back!
A ring I have
But ideas I lack.
My skills have not grown
But my mind is rested
And in this endeavor
I am reinvested.
I hope my poems
Inspire laughter
And bring you joy
During and after
Your car breaks down
Or your pet dies
Or you pay too much
For disappointing fries.
With all that said
Adjourn I must
For I need more sheets
That say “In God We Trust”.
A Moment Of Silence (For A Month)
I’m getting married in two weeks
And there’s a lot to do
So I’m taking a mental break
Until I say “I do.”
And when November comes around
My poems will come back.
For now though, may your dreams be light
And your teeth be free of plaque.
Realistic Goals
Tomorrow’s the day I’ll do everything
And be the best version of me.
I’ll accomplish my dreams and be happy
And authentically awesome to see.
I’ll shoot for the moon and I’ll hit it!
I’ll inspire the brave and the true!
But today I’ve reserved to be average
And embody “I’m fine, how are you”.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 