There once was a female spouse
Who said “Hi” as I came in the house.
She told me her stories,
Her pains, and her glories,
And now I need to write a poem before I go to bed… ouse.
Tag Archives: Limerick
Duo, Pourquoi Es-Tu En Colère?
There once was a multilingual green owl
Whose temper had grown fully foul.
He said “Practice your French!”
As he pulled out a wrench
Then watched me spell “vingt” with a scowl.
Filed under Poems
Every Musical Ever (You’re Welcome!)
There once was a first-billed actress
Who’s uncertain leading man will bring bliss.
They’ll sing and they’ll dance
And they’ll sing and they’ll dance
And they’ll sing and they’ll dance
And they’ll… you get the point…
And it ends with a curtain and kiss.
Filed under Poems
And Yet They Give These To Eleven-Year-Olds?
If I were a Pokemon master
I’d sure get to work a lot faster.
With my Dragonite I’d
No traffic abide…
On reflection, that would be a disaster.
Filed under Poems
My Superbowl Recap
Their once was an organized crime
Who fixed football games all the time.
Then a female singer
Put the crooks through the wringer
And black Tom Brady won with a dime.
Fishing For Likes?
There was like a guy from like somewhere
Who like liked like things like like long hair.
He like like-liked this girl
Whose hair had like a curl
And he was like “I like like-like you. So there.”
Filed under Poems
Live To Fight Another Month
There once was a man with a wife
Who, for some reason, valued his life.
Twas the week of the shark,
So he went to the park
Knowing she’s apt to wield a knife.
Filed under Poems
F***ing Chiefs Again? Really? Even Hollywood Is More Creative…
There once was a high football tier
That played Winter and Fall every year.
One day a guy tripped
But it wasn’t in the script
But the refs smiled and said “Hold my beer.”
Filed under Poems
“Hey Guys! What If We Hijack The Playoffs And Pretend It’s A Cool Innovation Instead Of A Paywall? I Bet Nobody Will Cancel Their Subscription The Day After.” -Some Peacock Exec, Probably
There once was a streaming station
Who aired a playoff game to the nation.
The broadcast was bad
And no one will be sad
If the ratings show as “Devastation.”
Filed under Poems
Seahawks Fans Right Now
There once was a team called the Bears
Who thrust my clan into despairs.
They sucked at a sport,
But so do my cohort
So at the end of the day, who cares?
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 