“Bring the ring to Mordor, kid”
Gandalf told me and so I did.
It caused me scars that forever linger,
Mostly that I can’t give Gandalf the finger.
Tag Archives: Short
Thanks, Millennials
If you’d like a hamburger
It only costs a dollar.
If you want cheese on it
It’ll cost you dollars two.
Want to add some bacon?
That’s two dollars fifty.
Want some avacado?
Your firstborn kid will do.
Filed under Poems
Or Did The Fact They Never Heated Up Mean The Prophecy Came True After All?
Somebody said to the NFL
“You gotta cool your jets”.
Alas, the Jets were never cool
Not unlike marionettes.
Filed under Poems
They Were Viva-ing La Vida Alright…
There once was a CEO
Who went to a Coldplay show.
The HR-H.O.E.
Said, “Kiss cam? OMG!”
And now the whole world’s in the know.
Filed under Poems
The YouTuber’s Origin Story
One camera.
Two fools.
Three hours of editing.
Zero rules.
Nine minutes
About a cruise.
Two hours later
Seven views.
Filed under Poems
Who Needs AI When You Have A Wife?
No AC?
Just live under a tree.
It’s cool as can be.
Just wait and see!
Filed under Poems
Origins of Childhood Trauma
Super secret base.
Red alert! It’s Mom and Dad
Taking pillows back…
Filed under Poems
Notting Hill
There once was a good-looking chap
Who spilled juice on a movie star’s lap.
They would, then they wouldn’t,
They could but they couldn’t,
And, my goodness, their acting was crap.
Filed under Poems
The Introvert’s Decision
Go big or go home?
Suffice to say I am not
Fond of going big.
Filed under Poems
Location Is Everything
Shelly sells seashells at the seashore.
Nobody quite knows what she does this for.
No one buys the shells she sells, so I am pondering
If Shelly’s shells are a shell business for money laundering.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 