When we met I asked “Can I buy you a drink?”
When we left I asked “Your place or mine?”
When the mood was right I leaned in close
And asked “you sure this is fine?”
And so the night proceeded,
As again consent was had
For removing one sock, then the other, then a shirt,
Just to make sure no one felt bad.
And as I removed my underthings
(Consensually, and with heart)
I realized I hadn’t checked about my shoes
And suggested we restart.
She said she was ok with it
And told me “just whip it out!”
So I grabbed my legal contract
And she began to pout.
At this point I could see
She wasn’t happy, so we parted.
I was just happy to be safe.
She was broken hearted.
The Daily Travesty 