Tag Archives: Limerick

It Was This Or Eight Pre-Scheduled Haikus

There once was a poet (that’s me)

Who’s vacationing tomorrow at sea.

I’ll be gone a week, and lack

Internet access (Alack!)

So I won’t publish for a while. Sorry!

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Heaven Forbid!

I’m sensing some commonplace themes

That is fear of fascist regimes

Where government’s shrinking

And people start thinking

And grocery receipts don’t cause screams

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There Once Was A Person From Right Here…

Tonight we play D&D

And pretend to not be me

And instead be a wizard

Who’s also a lizard

And does not write bad poetry.

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Burn Those Calories!

I once had a buddy named Roddy

Whose fitness routine was shoddy.

His plan, as he stated,

Was to just be cremated

And end up with a smokin’ hot body.

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For Reference, The Question Was “Why Do You Need To Visit Congress”

There once was a venomous fly

That, with one touch, could make a man die.

It’s untraceable and yellow.

I’ll release it, dear fellow,

And that is my whole answer why.

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Plane And Simple

While early birds may get the worm

Another truth may make you squirm:

Early birds often get

Sucked into a jet

And thus, to sleep late, I affirm.

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Debate Limerick, 2024

There once was a were roses were blue

Or they were red, but they can be that too

And they went oh gone by the thing

And the… he’s a bad flower and I’m king

And we beat medicare and covid is a jew.

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Still Better Than Poetry

I applied for a new job today

With better benefits and pay.

It’s that eel that pops out

From a rock, looks about,

And goes back inside 10,000 times a day.

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Rare Steak: Origins

Once, a guy ordered a steak

But the chef’s credentials were fake.

He said “Blood means its yummy.

“Raw is good for your tummy.”

And now that’s just what people make.

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The Only Difference Is One Candidate Was Convicted

There once was a hush-money trial

That went on for quite a while.

The jury used their melon

And decided he’s a felon

But he’ll still win votes with a smile.

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