His heart was as big as a pop-up ad
On a movie you watch on your phone.
His mind was as big as the X in the corner
That tells it to leave you alone.
Tag Archives: Truth
What Happens When I Get Less Than 14 Hours Of Sleep
Today I am sleepy.
Tomorrow I’m somnolent.
Many already realized
This poem won’t rhyme.
Filed under Poems
No Joke!
Moreso than drugs or heart disease,
Moreso than any tumor,
Most tragedies in life are caused
By lacking a sense of humor.
Filed under Poems
Meanwhile, At Netflix Headquarters…
In Japan they make cartoons
With people named Jojo or Light…
And even though they’re Japanese
The characters are all white…
But when we film an adaptation
Fans of the original are mad
Because we only hired white actors
And, apparently, that’s bad?
Filed under Poems
Why Fictional Japan Is Objectively The Best Country
On TV, the blue-haired girl
Is innocent and kind.
She cooks and cleans and loves you
For your heart, not your behind.
She’s fearful, but she conquers it;
Was blind, but now she sees.
In real life, the blue-haired girl
Thinks men are a disease.
Filed under Poems
I Wrote My Mom A Good Poem. This Isn’t It, You Freeloader :-)
I like to think of weird jokes
So I wrote one and hid it.
It’s not a “Yomama” joke
‘Cause then everyone would get it!
Filed under Poems
Why Poetry Is Art
If, in normal conversations,
It were assumed that one should rhyme
We’d have a better grasp of grammar
And awkward silence a lot of the time.
Filed under Poems
There’s Still Time To Write-In Chuck Norris…
One world leader said
“Grab ’em by the pussy,”
But got elected anyway.
One would-be leader
Said “Don’t grab ’em by the pussy”
Before he did, so I guess he’s okay?
Filed under Poems
How Ominous?
I saw an omen in the night.
I said, “You’re bad.”
It said, “You’re right.”
You say you saw the omen too.
You said, “You’re good.”
It said, “That’s true.”
I asked the omen, “How is it
“To them you’re great,
“To me you’re shit?”
The omen smiled and replied
“I choose to be
“What you decide.”
Filed under Poems
Coping With Invisibility
When I feel invisible
And that feeling makes me sad
I think of 5’11” African-American dads who play the viola, vote libertarian, and write poetry blogs
And I don’t feel so bad.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 