One day, a cat suggested
“Wouldn’t it be great
“If we walked up to humans,
“Who we obviously hate,
“And acted cute and fluffy
“‘While we multiply their struggles?”
That cat is world famous now;
His name is Mr. Snuggles.
Tag Archives: Conspiracy
Dear Conspiracy Theorists…
Some people believe
That our world will be conquered
By satanic lizards from Mars.
To those folks I say,
“Don’t be scared… it’s okay.
“Their rulers are better than ours!”
Filed under Poems
I’m Just Gonna Let This Hang Here…
Swords have cross-guards,
Hammers have heads,
And NFL cornerbacks
Often have dreads.
Movies have releases
And novels have printin’s,
But why can’t Taylor Swift
Have some dirt on the Clintons?
Filed under Poems
Vegan Conspiracies
They make blueberry, strawberry,
Blackberry jam,
But not jam out of chicken,
Venison, spam.
Why do we make paste
Out of fruits and such
But not dead animals?
Suspicious much?
Filed under Poems
What The News Won’t Tell You
Mass media provides
A service in which they
Share public information
Of what happens every day.
But the news is not reliable
To show an uncomfortable scoop
Like the hundreds of would-be bombers
Who thought “nah, I gotta poop.”
No matter how they try
And no matter how they zoom
Cameras never show a person
Standing in an empty room.
They won’t report this poem
On MSNBC.
They won’t tell other countries
About you, him, her, and me.
So I spend time on Facebook
‘Cause the news is relevant there
Until I see pics my friend’s friend liked
And then even I don’t care.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 