“Why do you have a dog poop bag
“If you don’t have a dog?“
“I still have poop though, don’t I?“
-Conversations from my jog
Tag Archives: Dogs
Oh, You’d Prefer To Hear About How He Ran Fast Instead? Typical…
This is Spot.
Spot is a dog.
Spot spots his “spot spot”
(Where spot peed on a log).
Spot spotted Spot’s “spot” spot
In Spot’s “spot spot” spot
But Spot’s spotter, Miss Potter,
Alas spotted not.
Since Miss Potter missed Spot’s spot,
In an act of good will
Spot pointed Miss Potter
But she spotted-not still.
Spot spotted Miss Potter
(His Spotter) her pay
And Spot spotted his “spot spot”
And sped on his way.
Filed under Poems
Pets
A dog can be bouncy, beautiful, brash,
A lover of children, a chewer of trash,
A pooper, a woofer, a good boy or girl,
Who can sit, stay, roll over, shake hands, even twirl.
A dog is a friend, a companion, a pillow,
With fur short like mown grass or long like a willow.
A dog will be loyal. Meanwhile, a cat
Will be catty, get fatty, and thus that is that.
Filed under Poems
Optimism, First Grade Prepper Edition
I know that world war 3 is coming
And it’ll be really bad
But when you remember what comes next
It takes away the sad
‘Cause world war 4 is going to be fought
With sticks and stones they say
Which means puppies will be soldiers
And puppies make us yay!
Filed under Poems
A Party They’ll Talk About For Years
Lovely bowl of fuchsia punch
On a granite countertop
Beside a vibrant floral bunch
And someone’s shouting “stop”
As my purebred chocolate lab
Puts Olympians to shame
And crash! They’re calling me a cab
And saying I’m to blame…
Filed under Poems
Doggy DNA Tests (Or The National Origin Of The Chihuahua)
Huskies are Siberian.
Great Danes are German.
I’m not sure about yours though
Cause it’s merely a vermin.
Filed under Poems
“Noble”
There once was a noble chihuahua
Whose owner was trapped in the shower.
He flew like an ace
To bite her on the face
Then barked nonstop for 24 hours.
Filed under Poems
Scorpion Owners Just Laugh…
Doggie cuddle
In a puddle;
Heart and muzzle
Under the stars.
Kitty snuggle
Is a struggle;
With every nuzzle
A few more scars.
When Vegetarians Snap
There once was a Chihuahua from next door
That barked, whined, and then barked more.
Eventually he died
And nobody cried.
In other news, now I’m a carnivore.
Filed under Poems
When You Speak To A Chihuahua Without A Stupid Accent…
“You’re a good boy! Yes you are!”
They said and pulled me to the car.
But they didn’t use a cutesy voice
So I killed them (I had no choice).
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 