I found a fun video game
That simulates many ways to die.
The designers overlooked the simple fact
That survival means I’d have to try.
Tag Archives: Lazy
A Very Heartfelt Easter Poem
Happy bunny day today
To those who hunt for eggs and pray
And also Lent is done so yay!
That’s all I’ve got, so go away.
Filed under Poems
Next Year I Resolve To Put More Effort Into Hindsight
Looking back at 2022
I had a revelation that I’d like to share with you:
I realized that retrospectives take a while to do well
So I’ll end this poem early and say this year was pretty swell!
Filed under Poems
This Poem Is Probably Racist And Hates Short People
Last night I wrote a lot.
Tonight I wrote much not.
The kettle is black and so is the pot.
Filed under Poems
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humptulips,_Washington
There once was a man from Humptulips
Who worked in a restaurant for a few tips.
He made decent money
But mostly it’s just funny
That there’s an actual town called Humptulips.
Filed under Poems
True Love, 2022
Upon the sofa down we sat,
Eating ice cream, happy, fat,
Eyes on the TV, wearing no pants:
This is my ideal of romance!
Filed under Poems
Artistic Priorities
Today I was a DJ
At a wedding for my friends.
It was great, but tiring
And thus this poem ends.
Filed under Poems
Meta Stuff Is Cool Again, Right?
There once was a guy who drove home
And was tired from toes to his dome.
He wrote a lazy limerick
And rhymed it with slimmer dick
And this won’t get published in my next tome.
Filed under Poems
Seriously, When Was The Last Time You Went To The Movies And Enjoyed It?
Someone in Hollywood decided
“What if instead of crappy flicks
“We badly remade everything people love
“And when they complain, say that they’re dicks?”
Everyone outside Hollywood
Disliked this judgement call,
But on the bright side, now people
See that books aren’t that bad after all.
Filed under Poems
Your Math Teacher Warned You…
There once was a magical hero
Who divided the whole world by zero.
Trof huaknr jshfl ej
Helfpbe nfhoshe nej
Htppbej jfhw jfjr yeega beero.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 