Looking back at 2022
I had a revelation that I’d like to share with you:
I realized that retrospectives take a while to do well
So I’ll end this poem early and say this year was pretty swell!
Tag Archives: Lazy
This Poem Is Probably Racist And Hates Short People
Last night I wrote a lot.
Tonight I wrote much not.
The kettle is black and so is the pot.
Filed under Poems
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humptulips,_Washington
There once was a man from Humptulips
Who worked in a restaurant for a few tips.
He made decent money
But mostly it’s just funny
That there’s an actual town called Humptulips.
Filed under Poems
True Love, 2022
Upon the sofa down we sat,
Eating ice cream, happy, fat,
Eyes on the TV, wearing no pants:
This is my ideal of romance!
Filed under Poems
Artistic Priorities
Today I was a DJ
At a wedding for my friends.
It was great, but tiring
And thus this poem ends.
Filed under Poems
Meta Stuff Is Cool Again, Right?
There once was a guy who drove home
And was tired from toes to his dome.
He wrote a lazy limerick
And rhymed it with slimmer dick
And this won’t get published in my next tome.
Filed under Poems
Seriously, When Was The Last Time You Went To The Movies And Enjoyed It?
Someone in Hollywood decided
“What if instead of crappy flicks
“We badly remade everything people love
“And when they complain, say that they’re dicks?”
Everyone outside Hollywood
Disliked this judgement call,
But on the bright side, now people
See that books aren’t that bad after all.
Filed under Poems
Your Math Teacher Warned You…
There once was a magical hero
Who divided the whole world by zero.
Trof huaknr jshfl ej
Helfpbe nfhoshe nej
Htppbej jfhw jfjr yeega beero.
Filed under Poems
The Weaker Poetry Bloggers, One Year Into The Apocalypse… #Weak
‘Twas on a night near end of Spring
When I was asked to write a thing
Describing how the flowers bloomed
Even though humanity’s doomed.
“Roses are red“, so started my verse
“And violets are blue, unlike that hearse.”
And then I decided since I’d end up dead
To quit writing poems and play golf instead.
So wrote a lesser poet just days
Before he was eaten by the undead horde.
When apocalypse comes, I’ll struggle in ways
But never complain that, when writing, I’m bored.
Filed under Poems
Last Night’s Bad Decisions Lead To… Not Exactly Redemption
Whenever a poem begins with “tonight”
You pretty much know it’s no good
So this morning I’m writing early
Because I figure I should.
The problem is autobiographical poems
Are also universally mediocre
So maybe instead of being a poet
I should take up professional poker?
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 