Tag Archives: Lazy

I’m Sleepy, You Have Low Expectations… Let’s Compromise

Brevity is a virtue…

Perfect rhyming too

I have one of those

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The FBI Limerick

There once was a [redacted] from [redacted]

Who really [redacted] with [redacted].

He [redacted] one day

In a [redacted] way

And [redacted] [redacted] his anus.

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Haiku: When Someone Tells Me There Are More Than 2 Genders

Ha ha ha ha ha,

Ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha.

Wait, there’s more… (pause)… Ha.

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And Your 2021 Nobel Peace Prize Nominee Is…

Today I did nothing

And it was amazing!

I sat on my butt and was still.

I looked into space

And thought about eating

But lacked all the required will.

I noticed the clock

As the hours ticked by

And almost did something by caring

But I fought the urge

And then happily lapsed

Back to stillness and vacantly staring.

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Sometimes You Never Reach The Point

If I were a slug

I would say a lot of stuff

And eventually

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If You Can Read This, Don’t Bother

Today is a holiday

As you likely know.

I ate. Now I’m lazy

So I’m gonna go.

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Be Me At 11:49

There once was a poet from here

Who enjoyed quite a bit of good cheer.

He ran out of time

To make comedy rhyme

But I’ll be better soon, never fear!

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Tell Me This Doesn’t Rhyme!

Ding Chang was changing his password

To 🈚️🈶🈷️🈸🈺

But Google called it invalid

So instead he wrote 🈚️🈶🈷️🈸🈵

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Dictionaries: For The Days Your Mind Doesn’t

This evening I’m in a way

Where I feel I must say

That I feel my condition

Is quite laodicean

And thus I call it a day.

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A Bouquet Of Wallflowers

My bedroom, how graceful

The comfort it brings me.

The light through the window

Shines down from above,

And in shadows dancing

On white walls beside me

I find solace in the silence,

Alone with my love.

I remember old friendships,

The names so long forgotten,

Imagine the knowing glances

From one yonder dove,

Then flick on my TV

And lean back among the shadows,

In comfort with my companion,

My bedroom, my love.

Now not ten feet beyond it

A house, warm and welcome, beckons.

It bids me to come explore it,

Partake of its food,

And deep in my spirit

The call echoes deep within me,

But I’d have to do some laundry

And I’m not in the mood,

So I recline ever gently

My blanket’s my body’s glove,

And spend more exotic moments

In the bedroom I love.

At 8:00 my phone’s alarm clock

Plays “Ih, What a Wonderful World.”

I listen intently

To Louis Armstrong’s voice.

I see skies of blue,

White clouds, dark and sacred nights,

And see also comfy pillows

And soon make my choice.

And though I’m unemployed now

And probably approaching my doom

These words they will write on my tomb:

“His bedroom he loved.”

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