There once was a man in DC
Who wrote bill A11-03.
Before it was codified
Its contents were modified
And now it’s illegal to pee.
Tag Archives: Politics
Six Seasons And A Movie…
I’m not a huge fan of reality shows
But one that I think would impress
Is a battle-royale style contest between
All 535 folks in congress.
We’d give them katanas and send them away
To a place that’s devoid and bereft
And let them do anything they want to do
Until there’s just one of them left.
The final survivor gets to be president
And the senate and house get refilled
By neighbors and bosses and IRS workers
And anyone else we want killed.
Filed under Poems
Another Unifying Political Policy… Almost
I think most people are open
To human sacrifice. However
We disagree on who gets picked
And who will pull the lever.
Filed under Poems
Am I Trusting The Science Right Yet?
I want to compare test answers
‘Cause I don’t think I passed…
The world is going to flood because
We’re using too much gas
So an African guy made a car
That uses electricity
And people are setting those cars on fire
Because of bad publicity?
But I thought the existential threat
Was a warming atmosphere?
Why are we taking violent action
So the air cannot stay clear?
And somehow its the billionaires
Who’re making us be poor
By reducing all our taxes
And keeping thieves out of their store?
Forgive me if I missed a point…
There’s just so much to learn!
What say we light another joint
And watch the city burn?
Filed under Poems
Get It… Terrific?
I’ve heard people say leftists are happy
With Trump’s economics. A specific
Comment I heard is that they are feeling
A really strong feeling of tariff-ick.
Filed under Poems
Off The Grid
The government is playing Yahtzee
Except instead of rolling dice
They get to place the dice face-up
However they think is nice.
Meanwhile, they make us roll our dice
And tell them what we rolled
Even though they already watched us
And take half our score ‘til we fold.
Playing Yahtzee with the government
Is not a whole lot of fun
So that’s why I want to go live in the woods
With my wife, my dog, and my gun.
The Worst Place That Everyone Wants To Be?
Anerica is an evil place
Led by terrible rapists and thieves
And yet people say it violates their rights
If anyone asks them to leave?
Filed under Poems
The End Of An Era
There once was a puppet named Joe
And what he did he doesn’t know.
Tomorrow he leaves
And while blue-hair girl grieves
We’ll welcome back orange MAGA bro.
Filed under Poems
The Poetical Political Spectrum Test
The Left
If your daughter tells you “Mother
“I am actually your son”
Then tell him that’s amazing
And he’s still your favorite one.
The Right
If she says she wants testosterone
Tell her she’s testost-on-her-own.
Filed under Poems
That’s Why They Have You Beet…
There once were some people with torches
Who sat upon their front porches
And cried “People with pitchforks
“Are evil and rich dorks”
While the real evil people ate bortsch.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 