There once were a fly and a flea
Who were healthy and lived in a tree,
Then they flew in a flue
And contracted the flu
And decided to, from the flue, flee.
Tag Archives: Short
Strong Feelings Abound
I wrote a knock-knock joke
And put it on my page
But no one wrote to ask “Who’s there?”
Thus: My impotent rage.
Filed under Poems
When You Have A Punchline But It’s Four Syllables Long…
Step one: Be God’s son
Step two: Write on stone tablets
And Step three: Prophet!
Filed under Poems
[Insert That One Guy Here]
His heart was as big as a pop-up ad
On a movie you watch on your phone.
His mind was as big as the X in the corner
That tells it to leave you alone.
Filed under Poems
What Happens When I Get Less Than 14 Hours Of Sleep
Today I am sleepy.
Tomorrow I’m somnolent.
Many already realized
This poem won’t rhyme.
Filed under Poems
No Joke!
Moreso than drugs or heart disease,
Moreso than any tumor,
Most tragedies in life are caused
By lacking a sense of humor.
Filed under Poems
My Date Went Okay
I said, “Girl, you are fine.”
She said, “Boy, you’re adequate.”
After that things went alright
And basically, well, that was it.
Filed under Poems
Well, That Escalated Quickly…
If someone stomps a snail to death,
Then snails burn down a city,
Why is that conducive to
Making people think snails aren’t shitty?
Filed under Poems
When Cops Steal Your Pets (At Least You Still Have Your Family)
I got licked by a dog,
Then I got licked by a cat,
Then I got licked by my uncle
But the Feds put an end to that.
Filed under Poems
The Heroes We Need
The closest of friends
Were Buttock and Cheek.
One was quite hairy,
The other quite sleek.
Whenever the world
Seemed wrong for a bit
The two came together
And stopped all that shit!
Filed under Poems
