Men are from Mars.
Women are from Venus.
Explain in 500 words
Why you should chop off your penis.
Tag Archives: Short
Gun Control Logic Be Like…
There once was a gal in a chair
Who got stabbed while she sat there.
We then rightly deduced
Murders can be reduced
By banning all sitting. Sound fair?
Filed under Poems
Sympathetic Villains
I want a government run by puppies.
If you want that as well
Let’s team up and kill six-billion folks
And make the world more swell.
Filed under Poems
21st Century Love
Learning CPR
To kiss choking folks for free
Still beats dating apps.
Filed under Poems
Kitty Says…
I brought them a gift.
It flew off and bit their kid.
I’m the goodest boy.
No Fire Breath Required
Soon the dragons will come returning
And watch our nations burn and fall
And say, “My goodness, look at them go!
“Guess they didn’t need us after all.”
Filed under Poems
Listening Is Hard
“What do you want for your birthday?”
So many have asked this of me,
Yet I still have zero doomsday devices
And seventy-two graphic tees…
Filed under Poems
We Returned It Twice, But He Keeps Insisting…
Big fat fluffy cat
Thinks our Amazon wish list
Includes a dead bird
Filed under Poems
Win-Win
If we throw the politicians
Into the holy volcano of K’raxx’iss
We’ll either ensure a bountiful harvest
Or pay a lot less in taxes.
Filed under Poems
Share This With Anyone Who Disses Your Business Idea
Styrofoam peanuts
Plus some sugar and orange paint:
Still in business how?
Filed under Poems
