Look at the stone, all majestic and gray;
It makes mountains strong and foundations stay.
Stone can be gems or statues or a castle
And if you think paper beats them, then you are an assh’le.
Tag Archives: Silly
Poke Holes In This Strategy If You Can
I think all the world’s problems
Could be solved in a day if we
Just banded together to kill politicians
Whose surnames don’t end with “qz”.
Filed under Poems
What Do We Want? Catchy Slogan! Where Do We Want Them? On Premium Cardstock!
As people protest from the East to the West
Why aren’t more onlookers suspicious
Of the motives behind the folks who sell signs?
(Or is thinking such things inauspicious?)
Filed under Poems
Yeah, Like My Coworkers Read My Blog… 😂
There once was a poet at work
(I’m at lunch, so naught do I shirk).
I ate quickly so
I cranked out a po
Em. How’s that for a quirk?
Filed under Poems
Buck Shot, But Not Well
Sometimes when it’s peaceful
In the evening by the stream
I like to lie beside the bank
And oh-so-gently dream
That as the humans hunt the deer
The deer hunt us the same,
But humans never notice this
‘Cause deer have lousy aim.
Filed under Poems
Ode To J
What if there were a letter
That was pronounced like a Y,
But sometimes like DSH or an H
But it looked like a lowercase i?
The letter G would sounds like it
And it would be a name and a bird
And it would be madly exciting
But only if you are a nerd…
Filed under Poems
How To Make My Crush Fall Madly In Love With You
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Chocolate’s half price now
And I wonder… are you?
Filed under Poems
Street Wisdom, the New Hampshire Way
The hard drugs are named things
Like heroin and crack
And there are more I don’t know
‘Cause I’m white as a Mac.
Other drugs have names
Like Clopidogrel
So if you’re not sure if a drug’s “hard”
That’s one way to tell.
Filed under Poems
Opportunity Will Find You If You Stumble On Chances To Do Stuff, Maybe
I believe my destiny
Has been chosen just for me
By the position of the stars
And maybe too the moon and Mars
On the day that I was born,
But alas now I am torn
Because one newspaper said
“Watch out for someone who’s not dead”
While another warned me that
“You’ll meet someone that wears a hat.”
What am I supposed to do?
Watch for the hatted and the living too?
So many truths, I am forlorn!
Such woe is mine, a Capricorn.
Filed under Poems
The Sons Of Reuben Were All Prophets?
I think that Jesus didn’t have children
Because if he had children then
He’d make them sandwiches, but they’d complain
“Daaad… pastrami and rise again?”
—————————————————————
On the other hand, Moses was famous
For his sandwiches. That’s what I hear.
In fact, back in Egypt I heard he was voted
The Nigev desert’s manna the year.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 