When in doubt
Just sound it out
(Unless your words
Are “when” or “doubt”)
Tag Archives: Spelling
Also, If Anyone Knows How To Do Affiliate Marketing, Please Help Me Pay For The Lawyers?
I bought these things on Amazon
That turn your fire blue.
You throw a little packet in
And the flames change shades. It’s true!
But apparently my wife found them
And thought I was a liar
And I made the mistake of requesting
That she “dye in the fire”.
Filed under Poems
Task Failed Successfully
They said I couldn’t write a poem
Without using the letter “E”.
They were right, and yet somehow
I’m happy as can be.
On occasion you may find
Satisfaction without complying.
Also, I don’t know how to cut out
My first stanza… not lying!
Filed under Poems
OMG Dad, Why Can’t You Understand Vulture Is A Student Of The World?
Their wonce was amen from Bolder
Hoo new mai dotter end tolled hurr
“Eye a door ewe, Amanda
“‘Cause u un-derstanneduh
“Spelling sin the I of de beholdre.”
Filed under Poems
Confessions of a Former Spelling Bee Champion
There once was a guy named Kibau
Who lived on a farm with a plough.
He once swore a vow
Never once to say “Ciao”
And you get the point: Spelling is stupid.
Filed under Poems
Eau Know! Knot Yew Two!
There once was a fellow from Prague
Who went for a leisurely jague.
He ran for a while
With a big happy smhile
But, alas, he fell into a bague.
Filed under Poems
Dialects
In America we spell “color;”
In the UK it is “colour” with a U.
In America it’s “blue”
InFrance it is “bleu.”
In America it’s “Hell;”
In Middle Earth it is “Moria.”
In America it’s “yay;”
In Catholic it is “Gloooooooooooooo,ooooooooooo,ooooo,oooooo…ria!”
Filed under Poems
Bad Language?
Eye halve know aye Dia
Howe thoughs hoo dew knot no
How-to spellin’ English
Kant fig your it out, sew
Threw this Han dee poem
I salve Mai own dill Emma.
Hi expect, inn learning spannish
Their Will bee Noooooo! problema.
Filed under Poems
North and Whyknown’uh Approve
Parents these days think names
Are unique if spelled a different way.
Alas we end up asking
“How do you spell William with a K?”
Filed under Poems
Read This Poem To Your Children… You’ll Thank Me Later
Seahawks run.
Hawks run slowly.
Seahawks run quickly.
Spelling matters.
Patriots suck.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 