Who decided that “Nunchaku”
Should be pronounced like “Numb Chucks?”
I assume it’s some translator,
But they’re almost certainly dunfaku.
Tag Archives: Stupid
Gift Cards
Happy Birthday dude!
Here’s cash you can only spend
Somewhere you don’t go.
Filed under Poems
Another Inconvenient Truth
If you’re struggling in your career
Give Hollywood a call
Because there’s no script for a 67 movie yet
And they’ll take anything at all.
Filed under Poems
We’ve Come A Long Way Since 867-5309
The upside of the “6-7” trend
Is that it may show the unheralded end
Of kids saying “420-69”
Which makes me feel better than fine.
Filed under Poems
Congressional Privilege
So we can’t pay employees
Who keep on working hard
Despite a shut-down government
With a maxed-out credit card
And yet we pay the people
Who got us in this mess
With money that we do not have?
‘Murica, I guess…
Filed under Poems
Oh Yeah… We’ll Also Make Every Micro-Sheet Get Dispensed Using Electricity Made From Burning Coal
So paper towels are made from trees
And killing tree will kill the Earth
So to save more trees and thus the planet
We must have a towel dispenser rebirth:
Henceforth no towel dispenser shall
Give more than a three-inch sheet.
Of course you can use it unlimited times.
Isn’t saving the planet neat?
Filed under Poems
Choice of the FedEx Driver
I could park my truck
And walk up to the house
And place a package on the door
Or hand it to a spouse.
I also have the option
To relive my high school ways
And chuck a 40-yard touchdown
With whatever peasants buy these days…
Filed under Poems
Hark! I, The Bard, Doth Telleth Of Some Happenings That Art Off The Hook, Yo!
“Once upon a time…”
Is the ye olde way to say
“Get a load of this…”
Filed under Poems
High School Science, 2025
Men are from Mars.
Women are from Venus.
Explain in 500 words
Why you should chop off your penis.
Filed under Poems
Solving The Hunger Crisis One Innovation At A Time
In the future you’ll go to buy groceries
And the checkout robot will ask
To confirm that you are human
By completing a simple task:
Enter your username and password
And a random six-digit code
That was transmitted to your brain chip
From the authenticator node
Except your authenticator
Got a security update
That prevents your internal keyboard
From typing the number “8”
So you pause your grocery buying
And call the password reset guy
Which is just another robot
And you check “yes” to die.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 