Happy Birthday dude!
Here’s cash you can only spend
Somewhere you don’t go.
Tag Archives: Truth
Read That Last Word With Four Syllables To Make Me Seem Smarter
When you are a poetic bard
Having a social life is hard
Because you may be out at night
But need to do a daily write.
Hypothetical as this may sound
This is where I, this night, am found.
When you read other brief poems by me
Know that I’m healthy socially.
Filed under Poems
K-5 Education
If you could just close your mouths
And let your feet be still
Your mind would find a sense of peace
And overflow with skill.
If you could keep your eyes on me
And your hands to yourself
You’d find your time so much more free
And your talent upper shelf.
If you could focus for a blink
And persevere a while
You’d all be smarter than you think
And make a teacher smile.
And yet as you deny these things
I’m please to end a day
When you can do a two-plus-two
And know that biting’s not ok.
Filed under Poems
A 30-Something’s Review of Fortnite
In my day, our violent games
Were about shooting guys and taking names.
Now you skydive, camp, and swim
And randomly change from her to him,
Running from a big pink cloud
And avoiding things that are scary or loud.
When I was young, you daren’t mess up
But now I guess we get to dress up?
Filed under Poems
Oh Yeah… We’ll Also Make Every Micro-Sheet Get Dispensed Using Electricity Made From Burning Coal
So paper towels are made from trees
And killing tree will kill the Earth
So to save more trees and thus the planet
We must have a towel dispenser rebirth:
Henceforth no towel dispenser shall
Give more than a three-inch sheet.
Of course you can use it unlimited times.
Isn’t saving the planet neat?
Filed under Poems
History Repeating Itself
Only took three years
Of England having a king
To become evil…
Filed under Poems
We Returned It Twice, But He Keeps Insisting…
Big fat fluffy cat
Thinks our Amazon wish list
Includes a dead bird
Filed under Poems
TL;DR — Game of Thrones
There once was a powerhouse show
About dragons and some dude called Snow.
It ran for eight seasons
But for several reasons
We don’t talk about it no mo’.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 