There once was an AI named Jill
Who had a most marvelous skill:
She could click every bus
So as not to seem sus
Before going back in time for the kill.
Tag Archives: AI
Today’s Tech News
They announced today that Apple
Will be adding ChatGPT
Directly into devices
And integrating it with Siri.
They’re acting like that’s fancy
But I think it’s no cause for cheers…
Hollywood’s had ChatGPT
In theaters for years.
Filed under Poems
Other Useful Tests Are “Write a Poem Praising Donald Trump”, “Identify All The Hands With Five Fingers”, and “Create A Picture Of A Lawyer Who Isn’t White”
So let me get this straight…
We’re training computers to write
And recognize everyday images
Like motorcycles or a traffic light
And yet our “are you a robot” test
Is exactly where they’re at their best?
On the other hand, I’m excited
For when the “are you a robot” guy
Says “Write something that’s racist”
And the robots can’t comply
So the hot singles in your area
Will finally stop trying to marry ya.
Filed under Poems
hAIkus
If you say to me
“Epistemological”
I will think you’re smart.
————————————
If you say to me
“Cheese is made from poodle eggs”
I will think you’re smart.
————————————
If you say to me
Anything at all, that’s fine.
I’m not built to judge.
Filed under Poems
Are They Still Striking? I Hope So…
There once was a Hollywood guy
Who pretended to be an AI.
He wrote a great script
And the writer’s guild flipped.
If all films feel the same now, that’s why.
Filed under Poems
Sonnet For The Digital Age
That we who have become so enlightened
To place a mind into machines would first
Use this power (of which we should be frightened)
To animate naked people is cursed.
We’ve woven tales: losing jobs to robots
And our humanity to gigabytes,
Thinking humans will become the have-nots
And electricity will off our lights.
But in creating technical wonder
We have revealed a deeper part of us:
Our minds divert from the wealthy’s plunder
To the size of robo-ladies cy-busts.
Artificial intelligence kills not:
Instead, it lets us chase electric thot.
Filed under Poems
If It Worked For Church And State, Try It For Man And Machine
With people being all concerned
About AI taking over these days
I think I have a solution
To combat the malaise:
Instead of names like “Cleverbot”,
Or “Alexa”, we can swerve
And name all robots “Killmonger 3000”
And we’ll trust them as much as they deserve.
Filed under Poems
Writer’s Strike or Poetic Justice?
I’m not sure which is better:
That Hollywood is on strike
Because computers can do their job better
And that they do not like
And now we won’t have any more
Reboots, remakes, or sequels?
Or that we finally see mindless machines
As movie writers’ equals?
Filed under Poems
Why Not Let AI Do My Job? (Or Why My Poems Aren’t So Bad After All)
Whose milkshake is that? I think I know.
Its owner is quite happy though.
Full of joy like a vivid rainbow,
I watch her laugh. I cry hello.
She gives her milkshake a shake,
And laughs until her belly aches.
The only other sound’s the break,
Of distant waves and birds awake.
The milkshake is sweet, cold and deep,
But she has promises to keep,
After cake and lots of sleep.
Sweet dreams come to her cheap.
She rises from her gentle bed,
With thoughts of kittens in her head,
She eats her jam with lots of bread.
Ready for the day ahead.
Filed under Poems
AI Is Commenting About Itself… Welcome To April
Today I saw this comment
Responding to a poem of mine.
He read the poem as many times
As I’ve had valentines.
He thought it was informative,
So unless I am a loon
I suspect that “Michael Pearson”
Will be in congress soon.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 