Like the breath of the moon I watched my thoughts
And sang within my heart,
Combining dreams with promises
Into an invisible art.
I listened for the absent birds
Counting seconds before they pass
Which is a more mystical way to say
I was tired so I sat on my ass.
Filed under Poems
Obi Wan Kenobi
Was arrested yesterday.
He force-pushed a clone trooper
Who had been in his way.
“In my defense, the trooper
“Was swearing as I recall,”
Said Obi Wan, the Jedi
Who made an obscene clone fall.
Filed under Poems
They described me as a “figment.”
They told you I’m not real
Even though nobody asked me
Whether that’s the way I feel.
They told you to let go of me,
To let illusions end
As if it were no trouble at all
To walk out on a friend.
They closed their eyes and turned their backs
And said “You’re hearing voices.”
They gave you lots of pretty pills
And, lying, called them choices.
“It’s your imagination,”
So they said and so they thought.
They don’t know imagination
Is the truest friend you’ve got.
They’re offering a tunnel
Ending in a wall of light;
It’s up to you to say what’s true,
To help your friend, to fight.
Who’s to say you’re crazy
Just for seeing what they won’t?
They offer you your sanity
While I most proudly don’t.
So do you leave me lifeless
And go on with real living,
Accepting their reality
And chemical’s they’re giving
Or do you block the wall of light
And beckon me to stay
And live a life beside me
In a state of endless play?
To take the pill and up you grow
Or spit it out and smile?
Love, your imagination friend…
I’ll see you in a while.
Filed under Poems
Most people think that XXX
Means that a movie’s dirty,
But there’s a Roman guy somewhere
Who thinks the movie’s 30.
Filed under Poems
Imagine there’s a world where aliens
Use human to wash dishes after a meal
And now you have a better sense
Of how sponges probably feel.
Filed under Poems
Imagine there’s a world where aliens
Use human to wash dishes after a meal
And now you have a better sense
Of how sponges probably feel.
Filed under Poems
I like girls who are polite
And women who are modest.
I like girls with joie de vivre
Although they’re not the hottest.
I like girls who demonstrate
A sense of generosity
Yet girls I meet prefer to flaunt
Their callipygiosity.
Filed under Poems
Someone approached my wife and asked her
“Is your man a good multitasker?”
My wife said, “No, he’s really bad.”
I stopped listening then so I could get mad.
Filed under Poems
If you need to do brain surgery
Make sure someone sees ya
‘Cause otherwise you might mix up
Euthanasia and anesthesia.
Filed under Poems
What’s most nearly opposite
To gently falling rain,
Your lover’s gentle heartbeat,
And comfort of the brain?
The answer starts with “Someone”
And ends with “Else’s baby on a plane.”
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 