A dinosaur wished upon a star:
“I wish the pain would stop!”
The star pulled out its Glock and said
“You’re lucky I’m a cop.”
Tag Archives: Silly
That Climax Be Like…
There was a bomb on main street
Set to blow at 5:08
I pulled up at 5:14
Because the traffic made me late.
I had only seconds left
Before the bomb blew me away
An hour later ’twas defused
And I, the hero, saved the day!
Filed under Poems
Perhaps?
“Maybe Baby” is an overused rhyme,
So said my love, May Bee.
But I said, “Maybe, May Bee, my baby,
“But be that as it may,
“Maybe let ‘Maybe Baby’ be as it may be.”
Filed under Poems
Is This Too White, I Wonder ™?
Body and bread,
Sword and sheaf;
Stalk of muscle,
Blade of leaf;
Sweet or sour,
Baked or no;
It rises within us:
Tae Kwon Dough!
Filed under Poems
Man’s Best Friend Meets “The Man”
I was running with my dog
One Wednesday afternoon
When my puppy’s nose did spy
Malodorous raccoon.
Not the type to laugh at fate
My dog took up the chase.
Going zero to sixty in 3.2,
He should’ve won the race.
Alas, he turned a corner
Onto Lincoln Parkway South…
A german shepherd police dog
With radar gun in mouth!
I figured it was funny
Knowing the dog had snatched the gun
But funnier was how my pup
Went sixty to zero in 2.1
We got off with a growl,
The raccoon nowhere in sight.
I guess I should be grateful
That my puppy’s fur is white!
Filed under Poems
Kindness
I offered a homeless guy a place
To sleep under my roof.
He said to me, “I’m not a ceiling fan.”
Then to himself: “Lol, what a goof!”
Filed under Poems
LGBTQ, Not 10JQKA
I like to play poker with drag queens
‘Cause whenever they draw an ace
You know right away
‘Cause you know what they say:
They struggle to keep a straight face.
Filed under Poems
Sacrifice
She had wavy golden hair
That fell below her knees
The color of the summer sun
And lighter than a breeze.
She cut it when we married,
Though it was at my behest:
The hair would have been lovely
If it weren’t on her chest.
Filed under Poems
Suffice To Say, He Did Not Have The Last Word
There once was a poet named
Whose brilliance was greater than.
By leaving off the last
He got around the whole
And never again worried about.
Filed under Poems
If You Don’t Think This Poem Is Ironic, You’re Part Of The Problem
There’s no place for intolerance
Among people I know.
If you’re someone intolerant
Then you had better go.
Intolerance is evil
And if you disagree
Then you should be ashamed
And also learn to think like me!
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 