There once was a comic detective
Who had a unique bat perspective.
He had gadgets and jokes
‘Til the Hollywood folks
Said “Do more, but the fun is defective.”
Tag Archives: Batman
Batman!
There once was a millionaire socialite
Who liked to dress up and fight crime at night.
First he’d battle a villain
Then go home and be chillin’
And so far he’s exclusively white.
Filed under Poems
Think Of A Clown, But Creepy, Then Laugh A Lot And Act Evil…
Jared Leto, as The Joker,
Made “Suicide Squad” tolerable.
Joaquin Phoenix, as The Joker,
Made his film a billion-dollar-able
Heath Ledger, as The Joker,
Took the Oscar world by storm
And Jack Nicholson, as The Joker,
Was creepy, as per the norm.
Cesar Romero, as The Joker,
Was a true comedic villain.
With nothing but his voice
Mark Hamill made The Joker chilling.
Looking at this track record
All I have to say
Is maybe… (bear with me) maybe…
Joker’s an easy roll to play?
Filed under Poems
Batman Problems
Dick and Bruce went on a trip.
Dick asked “want to play Battleship?”
Bruce said “Sure, I want to play,
“But what’s a tleship anyway?”
Filed under Poems
The Hero We Deserve
I hope somewhere there is a bat
Who’s terrified of men
Who flew off to train with ninjas
And (insert syllables here) then
He became a vigilante
Fighting crime and stuff like that.
He holes up in his man cave
Because he’s called Manbat.
He wears a man-shaped costume
With a cape that’s shaped like fat.
The drives his manmobile badly
Because he is a bat.
I want this very badly
Mostly ’cause of the “man cave” pun.
His sidekick is called Flamingo
And yes, this poem is done.
Filed under Poems
Robin’s Faux-Pas
As I lay in the dust,
My body broken,
My blood pooling into a lake
I remembered saying
“At least I’m not an orphan.”
Sorry Batman, my mistake.
Filed under Poems
Fandoms
Frodo was a wizard
In a blue police box.
He keeps watch over Gotham
And wears “Game of Thrones” socks.
His nemesis was Gary Oak.
He aimed to misbehave.
If you understand this poem
Give a fellow fan a wave.
How to be Batman in 24 Hours
I manage some apartments
And I like to play some cards,
But this week I became batman.
It wasn’t all that hard.
I started by evicting the tenant
In apartment twenty two, man.
She moved away with her twenty cats.
I’d kicked out the Cat Woman.
That very night some friends of mine
Came over to play some poker.
We had a deck of fifty three cards,
So I took out the joker.
What villain will I conquer next
At my apartment in central Maine?
We’ll see, but first I’ll shop a bit
Online at, yes… E-bayne.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 