Born a nymph in the woods of Montana,
My life is lovely, brighter than a
Tag Archives: Life
Perspective
My friend says it’s stressful
Trying to stay on track,
Keeping up with work and play
And texting everyone back…
And here I am, still in bed
At 2:35,
Unemployed, without friends,
Feeling happy to be alive!
Filed under Poems
Also… It’s 7:56
If this were a job
It might get me fired
But this poem’s crap
‘Cause it’s late and I’m tired.
Filed under Poems
Towers of Solitude Circa 2020 (Dragons Not Included)
Mirror, mirror on the wall,
Who’s the fairest of them all?
Sorry princess, I can’t say…
Your credit card expired today.
Mirror, mirror of denial,
What about my winning smile?
Princess, although my heart leapt
That’s not a payment I accept.
Mirror, mirror I don’t know,
I’ve got a new email so…
fancychick@web.net
Want a two-week free trial of the best mirror yet?
The Debate Is Over
Childbirth is painful for women
And ball-kickage is painful for men
But after it’s done only one
Waits teo years, then says “Do it again!”
Filed under Poems
Too Old
When I am too old to dream,
My mouth too old to smile,
I’ll place my hand upon the land
And feel the Earth a while.
Upon my skin, too loose to shape,
I’ll feel the critters crawl,
Relearning birth through mother Earth
And joy in being small.
I’ll feel the weeds begin to grow
O’er feet too slow to flee
And feel at peace as I release
What I mistook as me.
I’ll look upon my old abode
With eyes I’ve never known,
Then look on all that dared to crawl
And all that’s ever flown,
To use the sight I once ignored
Or else dismissed in haste
And understand ’twas not my hand
On which the insects paced,
‘Twas not my flesh I left behind,
‘Twas not my body gone,
But merely tools to comfort fools
Before their moving on.
When I am both too old to dream
And old enough to go
I’ll make my lair in everywhere
Until you say hello.
Filed under Poems
The Case Against Hell
Were there an inventor,
Perhaps of a car,
And it found its vehicle flawed
I’d think that the fault
Was not with the car
But with it’s creator, Car God.
And if Car God said,
“You dumb stupid lemon,
“Made flawed because I wasn’t clever,
“Instead of repairing,
“Refining, retrying,
I think I’ll just burn you forever…”
If that were the case,
I’d want a new God
For fear that I might somehow fail.
But our God is better:
Our God is forgiving
For he made, but has not burned, kale.
Filed under Poems
Also, Life Is Better With Endless 8-Bit Russian Folk Music
In life, as in Tetris
Failure is guaranteed.
The longer you’ve been playing
The higher is your speed.
You choose where to place the blocks
That you’ve no strength to bend.
Your only goal’s to stay alive
Until the very end.
To play the lowest levels
Is a way to work off stress
But you’ll find when all is over
The rewards are much, much less.
You’ll win by staying focused;
You’ll lose if you get shot.
If you choose to try again
It may get worse… or not.
When you’re done the lowest scores
Are gone without a trace,
But for the few who managed to
Put everything in place
You’ll enter your initials
To claim your high score’s stake
And if you do not enter “ASS”
You’ve made a huge mistake.
Filed under Poems
If People Are Pissed About Masks…
I really hope for chaos’ sake
That the cure for Covid be
The presence of police
Because, well, blessed irony!
Filed under Poems
Extinction, Past and Future
I used to be a Dodo bird
But then I went extinct.
I came back as a Quagga
And then a Cape Verde Great Skink.
I’ve been a Passenger Pigeon
And even a Lesser Bilby.
I’ve yet to be a 5’11 male human
But soon, I fear, I will be…
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 