Warlords might not be
The sensitive type,
Not ones to use shampoo
Or lotions,
But they’re a lot better
Than pacifists
Who are racist
Against certain oceans.
Tag Archives: Short
You Scream, I Scream, We All Scream Because Of Them…
Some folks like chocolate ice creams,
Some folks prefer vanillas,
And some folks don’t like ice creams at all
Because they’re serial killas.
Filed under Poems
A Oui Problem…
When I discovered my gender-neutral parent
Was not my biological dad
I realized it was quite the faux pa.
Yes, this poem is bad.
Filed under Poems
Truth Hurts
She said “You’re too accommodating
“And also get defensive a lot.”
I said “That’s fine, we’ll work it out
“And also, no I’m not.”
Filed under Poems
Why Die For Your Country When You Can Respect Children?
Though you think of cops and firemen
Or a soldier or marine,
There are men in much more danger
Doing work that’s rarely seen.
I don’t mean high-rise window washers
Or test pilots, you fools!
I speak of male teachers
At elementary schools.
Filed under Poems
“One Man” Was Found Murdered In His Home That Same Evening
I asked “Why call it PMS?
“This will really save my bacon!”
One man wrote back “It’s PMS
“‘Cause ‘Mad Cow Disease’ was taken.”
Filed under Poems
What Degree of Bachelor?
I was sitting by myself
When, as if from out of thin air,
A nymph straight from my fantasies
Asked “Is anyone sitting there?”
I smiled as well as a man can smile
When faced with an 11/10
And said “It’s free.” She said “Lovely!”
Then gave it to her friend.
Filed under Poems
When The Subtitles Don’t Match The Singer
Sometimes I wonder
If deaf people have to censor rap videos
Because someone accidentally curses in sign language.
Filed under Poems
Immortality, Step One
I flirted with death
When I ran a red light.
Death tweeted #Metoo
‘Cause I’m male and white.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 