I wish we called colors by animal names
Because it’s infinitely more awesome
To paint a car shark instead of just grey
Or pour cream ‘til your coffee is possum.
Tag Archives: Short
Limerick for a Job Interview
There once was a gap in a resumé
That occurred when the candidate was away
‘Cause when you’ve had enough crap
Turns out a resumé gap
Can be just what you need. Okay?
Filed under Poems
An Accurate Portrayal Of Tension Is Limited By The Medium Of Expression
I’m on bad wifi
Trying to publish a post
But I think it might…
Filed under Poems
Root Beer
It’s brown, sweet, and bubbly
With plenty of fuzz
And it foams when you pour it
‘Cause that’s what it does.
But why I really love it
Is it’s the only thing that never
Appears in advertisements
Anywhere, ever!
Filed under Poems
A Political Prodigy
I think my daughter will be president
Because she’s only three years old
And already knows how to tell everyone
To shut up and do as they’re told.
Filed under Poems
Softball Questions
There once was a baseball glove
Who, with a human, fell in love.
You may doubt, but I’ll confirm it:
They lived together, but he’s a her mitt.
Filed under Poems
My Community College Application Essay
“He who thinks great thoughts
“Often makes great errors”.
That’s a quote from Martin Heidegger.
I don’t think great thoughts
And I also make great errors…
That’s a quote from me. Also, Flydeigger.
Filed under Poems
More Is Better
“Would you like to sit at the table”
My mother asked, her voice sour.
“I’m good” I replied, my voice filled with pride
As I stared down at her from my tower.
Filed under Poems
The Other Opening Was For “End Of Days Rituals Inc.
I got a job at the olive oil factory
And my coworker is a nun.
Now they can write “Extra Virgin” again
‘Cause for a while they just had one.
Filed under Poems
No Pain, No Gawain
I am getting sleepy
And I open wide to yawn,
Then I march into my bedroom
And put plate armor on.
My chainmail hugs me tightly
And I fall into a heap…
This is what I have to do
To get a good knight’s sleep.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 