Tag Archives: Life

PG-All Ages

Sometimes the things you grew up with

Can make you feel good

Like riding bikes and Pokemon

And being misunderstood

But when you grow, perspectives change

And you see a world in pain

And it can’t be changed by touching base

Or building the best paper plane.

You see a world with real struggles

And problems with no answer

And you decide to try something

Like curing AIDS or cancer.

But as perspectives change, I think

Some problems would be solved

If more people bought a new five-speed

Or cared how monsters were evolved.

Growing up is nice and all

But never you forget

The world needs childish grownups too

For poetry and… stuff.

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Another Night Of D&D

There once was a skeezy Paladin,

A sly assassin, a cheesy bard,

A moon priestess, an archer,

And they rolled the dice real hard.

They stopped a civil war of trolls

And saved a duke from bombs of magic

And they lived happily ever after

(Which is the opposite of tragic).

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Lessons in Fine Dining

Life’s like an Oreo cookie:

The start and the end are both crappy

But the more stuff you put in the middle

The more likely you are to be happy!

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Burning Flags

Many a child was inspired by a flag

To leave home on a bus and return in a bag,

To struggle and clash with another boy who

Was raised by a flag without red, white, or blue.

It may be a purpose to live under fire

Until you return or in glory expire,

But I seek a purpose where no flags will fly

And a world where no child is inspired to die.

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Or Am I Just Forgetful?

Today it is early.

Last night it was late.

Does my lack of a poem

Mean I had a good date?

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Afternoon People Are Fine Though

As you read this poem

You may look upon your clock

And see either the morning’s tic

Or else the evening’s tock.

I have advice to share with you

Be it the eve or morning;

First for my evening readers, I

Do share this somber warning:

For those whose work and leisure lasts

‘Til late at night like me

You run the risk of starting a blog

Of petty poetry.

But for the morning readers

Perhaps you’ll ponder thus:

How have you time to read crap

Writ by evening folk like us?

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In Retrospect, Childhood Had Its Perks

I have to go to bed soon

And wake up before quarter-to-noon

And then drive my car

And not get a gold star

And I can’t even watch a cartoon!

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A Boy Becomes A Man (Mouse Saga Pt. 2)

Snap crackle pop

Is the sound you hear

When you pour rice crispies

And have some fun.

Snap crackle pop

May also appear

When the mouse trap makes

Your husbandly duties done.

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Yet Another Tinder Success

She was skinnier than the toilet paper

They gave me in the slammer.

Her favorite flavor of potato chip

Was probably “Arm and Hammer.”

She weighs 90 pounds in flip-flops

And half as much without

And her hair was like the love child

Of silly string and sauerkraut.

When I picked her up at 7:00

I mistook her for her Pomeranian.

Turns out she was trilingual:

English, Klingon, and Albanian.

We went to see a movie:

“Alvin the Chipmunk meets Baby Shark.”

I’m not saying I’m desperate

But I think I felt a spark!

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12 Vs. 22

“My tummy hurts.

My throat is sore.

I don’t want to go school no more.“

“My soul is charred.

My dreams are dead.

Take an aspirin and go to bed.”

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