Under the apple tree
You are you, I am me.
We can hug and kiss all day
And never hear the others say
“Why are you kissing that horse?”
They don’t understand of course
But under the apple tree… well, there
No one ever seems to care.
Tag Archives: Love
How Quickly Things Change
Waiting for the bus
In the rain
Next to other people
Who don’t have their bus passes.
Waiting for the bus.
Such a pain!
Other people are talking to me
Mostly out of their asses.
Waiting for the bus,
Not a train.
Other people haven’t gotten the hint that my failure to acknowledge their attempts to converse mean I don’t want to converse.
Such is the transport of the masses.
Then the bus arrives
And my jaw falls limply.
She steps off, so graceful,
So beautifully simply.
I watch her meander
Like a flower in the breeze,
Warm and fragile like stained glass
And as innocent as a sneeze.
I mean to call out to her
So she might look my way
But I find my tongue and brain
Cannot agree on what to say.
I dumbly watch her disappear
And without so much as fuss
I’m standing by myself once more
Just waiting for the bus.
What I Look For In A Lady
I’d be wary of a felon
But she needn’t be a saint.
She eats food almost every day
And will very seldom faint.
She has two eyes, two nostrils too,
And her scalp is topped with hair.
Her days are always better
When she has access to breathable air.
I may sound picky when I say this
But she should have a mouth that can open.
Is there such a perfect girl?
Well, ’til we know, here’s hopin’.
Filed under Poems, Uncategorized
Economics Doesn’t Seem Like Such A Smart Path Of Study Now, Does It?
She looks at me with longing.
I see only snakes.
For a moment our eyes meet
Before I turn to stone,
Having time only to think
“Why didn’t I major in Greek Mythology?”
Filed under Poems
What Crabs Get
The hermit crab lived all alone,
Befitting of his name,
But he met a lady hermit crab
And talked and thrust and came.
Alas, he failed to protect himself
With a rubber or a thing of that yen
And he contracted a most vile disease:
In this case it was men.
Filed under Poems
Vulcans Makes Sh*tty Poets
When I see your smiling face,
Your shining eyes and feline grace
I almost feel something at all
But then I don’t. So there.
Filed under Poems
Vulcans Makes Sh*tty Poets
When I see your smiling face,
Your shining eyes and feline grace
I almost feel somethig at all
But then I don’t. So there.
Filed under Poems
Totally The Feelings Of Someone Else (Who Isn’t Me) For Margot Robbie That Are Probably Exaggerated And Definitely Not Mine… Probably
Margot, Margot, Margot Robbie:
You make me want to go and see
A film I likely won’t enjoy
‘Cause you are you and I’m a boy.
Margot, Margot, Margot Robbie:
Watching you is my new hobby.
Your hair, when styled in tails of pig
Makes my… heart… grow twice as big.
Margot, Margot, Margot Robbie:
You’re my favorite celebrity since whoever played Dobby.
The only thing more beautiful in my eye
Would be a reboot of Firefly.
Margot, Margot, Margot Robbie:
You’re hotter even than wasabi.
This poem’s a joke written for you.
Yes, I’m a Joker, so love me too!
Margot, Margot, Margot Robbie:
Not being with you makes me sobby
But in the unlikely event you won’t be my vixen…
Shailyn, Shailyn, Shailyn Pierre-Dixon.
Filed under Poems
The Wife And Mr. Chicken
No one warms my heart like you do,
For three minutes on medium heat.
Our families and neighbors judge us harshly
But I’m glad, to you, I’m just a piece of meat.
Filed under Poems
You’re The Only One
When I look at you
I see the stars in your eyes,
Round and full of love
And the same blue as the sky’s.
I see your lips, so ruby red
That whisper sweet lies
And I know you’re the only one.
Your hair is like a waterfall
Caressing my cheek.
The joy I feel around you
Makes my eyes spring a leak.
If I could only find the words
I know that I’d speak
To tell you you’re the only one.
You’re the only one
Who brings color to my world,
Who’s cooler than the winter
And more lovely than the fall.
The only one so beautiful
I cannot believe
That I feel no attraction at all.
You have an angel’s heart
And a siren’s sweet voice.
My apathy towards you
Cannot be by choice.
Maybe it has to do
With how you say “nice” as “noice.”
Whatever reason, you’re the only one.
You might just be an angel
Spreading joy to the land
The light of the world flowing
From the palm of your hand.
In spite of your perfection
You simply must understand
That you’re literally the only one.
The only one that leaves me
Feeling dry in my pants,
Uninspired to sing
And unwilling to dance.
You’re like an inconsistent meter
From one stanza to the next,
Which perhaps is why, from me,
You always will go un-sexed.
You’re the only one
To walk across a fire for me.
You’re maybe my only true love,
Destined for all time is you and me.
And so as this song/poem
Finds itself so near it’s end
Know that literally everyone turns me on
But you’re the only “just a friend.”
