Tag Archives: Truth

Imagination Friend

They described me as a “figment.”

They told you I’m not real

Even though nobody asked me

Whether that’s the way I feel.

They told you to let go of me,

To let illusions end

As if it were no trouble at all

To walk out on a friend.

They closed their eyes and turned their backs

And said “You’re hearing voices.”

They gave you lots of pretty pills

And, lying, called them choices.

“It’s your imagination,”

So they said and so they thought.

They don’t know imagination

Is the truest friend you’ve got.

They’re offering a tunnel

Ending in a wall of light;

It’s up to you to say what’s true,

To help your friend, to fight.

Who’s to say you’re crazy

Just for seeing what they won’t?

They offer you your sanity

While I most proudly don’t.

So do you leave me lifeless

And go on with real living,

Accepting their reality

And chemical’s they’re giving

Or do you block the wall of light

And beckon me to stay

And live a life beside me

In a state of endless play?

To take the pill and up you grow

Or spit it out and smile?

Love, your imagination friend…

I’ll see you in a while.

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Butt Weight… There’s More

I like girls who are polite

And women who are modest.

I like girls with joie de vivre

Although they’re not the hottest.

I like girls who demonstrate

A sense of generosity

Yet girls I meet prefer to flaunt

Their callipygiosity.

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Difficulties In Treating Dyslexia

If you need to do brain surgery

Make sure someone sees ya

‘Cause otherwise you might mix up

Euthanasia and anesthesia.

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Post-Holiday Pleasures

What’s most nearly opposite

To gently falling rain,

Your lover’s gentle heartbeat,

And comfort of the brain?

The answer starts with “Someone”

And ends with “Else’s baby on a plane.”

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Next Week: Child Puts “Mean People Suck” Bumper Sticker On Car, Wins Nobel Prize For Literature

It’s nice to know

In this day and age

Time Magazine will

Give you the front page

And give you the title

“Person of the year”

For being perturbed

Where rich people can hear.

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Search Engine Optimization

If you need to find info

Page 1 of Google’s where to go.

If you need to hide a thing

I’d suggest page 1 of Bing.

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The English Language Is Biased Against Non-Diurnal Happenstances, And I Won’t Stand For It!

For things in the past people will say

“Things in the past happened yesterday.”

But what I think just isn’t right

Is why we don’t say “Yesternight.”

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Bikinis

One thing I don’t understand:

Why men who stare are loathed.

If a woman is ninety-percent naked

Men just look at what is clothed!

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What A Glorious Evening!

This poem is late.

I am breeding Pokemon.

I have no girlfriend.

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Wise Men Know How To Stall

For every man there comes a day

When he must expel waste

And, being in a hurry,

Seeks to urinate with haste.

Soon after, they discover

As their throat fill up with phlegm

That their quest will be a failure…

Someone’s peeing next to them.

They stand in awkward silence,

As the urinals don’t sing

For as much as they both need to

They cannot eject a thing

And thus they close their zippers

And proceed to wash their hands

And go on with screaming bladders

To fulfill their life’s demands.

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