If you use YouTube
To watch people building things
Just retire now.
Tag Archives: Youtube
Just 51 More Years To Effective Governance
Little do we know that Mr. Beast
Has been filming a new video
That he started in 1776
And here’s how it will go:
“I locked every good politician
“In a cage for 300 years
“And if they stay the whole time
“They’ll be recognized by their peers.”
Filed under Poems
Tick Tock? Wait… That’s Not Right…
I had an hour this evening
So I watched Youtube for ten minutes.
Now it’s Saturday morning.
Funny how life goes, innit?
Filed under Poems
Still Better Than Status Quo
What if, instead of an election,
We had a Mr. Beast style event
Where we rented a hall full of obstacles
And made every potential president
Stay in the room with the challenge
To be the first one to tell us the truth.
I think that’s an alternate system
That would better engage with the youth.
Filed under Poems
I Think I Covered The Big Ones…
What type of Youtube watcher are you?
The type who watches that Indian dude?
Maybe the type who react to the trends
Or enjoys watching guys give cash to their friends?
Maybe you watch it for voice-to-text vids
Or use it to sedate your satanic kids?
If none of these channels tickles your tubes
Let me suggest another one – Boobs.
Filed under Poems
This Is How YouTube Channels Start…
I want to hire a deaf guy
To go to Olive Garden, where a
Waiter will grate a block of cheese
Onto his pasta marinara
And when the waiter asks “enough”
The deaf guy will stay quiet.
This is a lifelong dream of mine…
Know any deaf folks who would try it?
Filed under Poems
YouTube These Days
There once was a Nord VPN
Who played Raid: Shadow Legen(ds)
They sponsored this video
And now I must know
That Sharespace and GoDaddy come when?
Filed under Poems
Still No Cure For Cancer Though…
Every minute of every day
72 hours of film is uploaded and sent
Onto Youtube, and yet still people say
“Why’s there no good new content?”
Filed under Poems
My Evenings In A Nutshell
A few minutes ago
It was ten o’clock
And I yawned as I started for bed.
Now five minute later
It’s midnight
And awakeness is filling my head.
You may think I’m lying,
That physical science
Will prove that this poem’s untrue
But I beg to differ.
It’s a sterling example
Of what late-night Youtube binging can do.
Filed under Poems
Modern Sports
Thwunk!
Up goes the ball.
Oooh!
Up goes the excitement.
Aaaah!
Uo goes the hot dog guy into the ambulance.
Click!
Up go the youtube views.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 