I read a study recently
Where folks read poetry
Written both by poets
And impostor GPTs.
The funny part is readers
Rated all the AI stuff
Better in every category
Than the real poets’ fluff.
The only metric humans
Could equal AI at
Was the “originality” category.
Can you imagine that?
So, yes, robots are winning
But I’ll peacefully nap
Knowing I still have a stranglehold
On writing strictly crap.
For those interested: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-024-76900-1
Filed under Poems
Remember when the movies
Had awesome robot pals
Like R2, Gort, the Terminator,
Bender, Ultron, and Hal?
Remember how these robots
All were murderous piles of chrome?
And now I ask: why would you want
A robot in your home?
Filed under Poems
There once was an AI named Jill
Who had a most marvelous skill:
She could click every bus
So as not to seem sus
Before going back in time for the kill.
Filed under Poems
They announced today that Apple
Will be adding ChatGPT
Directly into devices
And integrating it with Siri.
They’re acting like that’s fancy
But I think it’s no cause for cheers…
Hollywood’s had ChatGPT
In theaters for years.
Filed under Poems
So let me get this straight…
We’re training computers to write
And recognize everyday images
Like motorcycles or a traffic light
And yet our “are you a robot” test
Is exactly where they’re at their best?
On the other hand, I’m excited
For when the “are you a robot” guy
Says “Write something that’s racist”
And the robots can’t comply
So the hot singles in your area
Will finally stop trying to marry ya.
Filed under Poems
If you say to me
“Epistemological”
I will think you’re smart.
————————————
If you say to me
“Cheese is made from poodle eggs”
I will think you’re smart.
————————————
If you say to me
Anything at all, that’s fine.
I’m not built to judge.
Filed under Poems
There once was a Hollywood guy
Who pretended to be an AI.
He wrote a great script
And the writer’s guild flipped.
If all films feel the same now, that’s why.
Filed under Poems
That we who have become so enlightened
To place a mind into machines would first
Use this power (of which we should be frightened)
To animate naked people is cursed.
We’ve woven tales: losing jobs to robots
And our humanity to gigabytes,
Thinking humans will become the have-nots
And electricity will off our lights.
But in creating technical wonder
We have revealed a deeper part of us:
Our minds divert from the wealthy’s plunder
To the size of robo-ladies cy-busts.
Artificial intelligence kills not:
Instead, it lets us chase electric thot.
Filed under Poems
With people being all concerned
About AI taking over these days
I think I have a solution
To combat the malaise:
Instead of names like “Cleverbot”,
Or “Alexa”, we can swerve
And name all robots “Killmonger 3000”
And we’ll trust them as much as they deserve.
Filed under Poems
I’m not sure which is better:
That Hollywood is on strike
Because computers can do their job better
And that they do not like
And now we won’t have any more
Reboots, remakes, or sequels?
Or that we finally see mindless machines
As movie writers’ equals?
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 