When black people get an education
People say they’re “Acting white”.
As a white person myself
I must say that isn’t right.
If you want to leave the ghetto
That’s an asian thing, for sure.
If you think I’m wrong, you’re gay.
Now speak English, por favor.
Filed under Poems
I want to compare test answers
‘Cause I don’t think I passed…
The world is going to flood because
We’re using too much gas
So an African guy made a car
That uses electricity
And people are setting those cars on fire
Because of bad publicity?
But I thought the existential threat
Was a warming atmosphere?
Why are we taking violent action
So the air cannot stay clear?
And somehow its the billionaires
Who’re making us be poor
By reducing all our taxes
And keeping thieves out of their store?
Forgive me if I missed a point…
There’s just so much to learn!
What say we light another joint
And watch the city burn?
Filed under Poems
I’ve heard people say leftists are happy
With Trump’s economics. A specific
Comment I heard is that they are feeling
A really strong feeling of tariff-ick.
Filed under Poems
Imagine a world where all is at peace,
A world without hunger or toil,
And ponder how easy a thing it would be
To go bomb them and take all their oil.
Filed under Poems
We’re hiring for a guinea pig
To work for forty hours
Making coffee for the mucky-mucks
With offices in towers.
The role pays $20k a year
So let’s post the job. Maybe
We’ll say that it pays 50k
And needs a master’s degree!
Filed under Poems
If you’re not in a haste
To reduce government waste
I invite you to pay
Extra taxes today
Filed under Poems
The fact that an unelected billionaire
Firing thousands of unelected folk
Is considered an outrage to many
Is my new favorite real-life joke.
Filed under Poems
The government is playing Yahtzee
Except instead of rolling dice
They get to place the dice face-up
However they think is nice.
Meanwhile, they make us roll our dice
And tell them what we rolled
Even though they already watched us
And take half our score ‘til we fold.
Playing Yahtzee with the government
Is not a whole lot of fun
So that’s why I want to go live in the woods
With my wife, my dog, and my gun.
There once was a form called the FAFSA
Which asked for my tax info. Laughs, ya?
Then my wife had to say
That yes, I did pay,
All to get zero money. That’s a gaffe-sa!
Filed under Poems
Anerica is an evil place
Led by terrible rapists and thieves
And yet people say it violates their rights
If anyone asks them to leave?
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 