It’s about this guy who’s a demon
With virile and plentiful… oh lord.
I tried dear, I swear
But I really don’t dare
To review the books that have you screamin’.
Tag Archives: Books
Give It To That One Friend Who Thinks Their Job Is Important
I want to read a novel
Where the fabled chosen one
Goes on a quest to do something
Like kill the god of the sun
And when we reach the ending
There’s a fabled chosen two
And there’s no sun god after all
And they don’t know what to do.
Filed under Poems
“Award Winning” Vs. “Best Selling”
For those who want to differentiate
Between “Fiction” and “Literature”
Here’s a handy-dandy little guide:
It’s fiction if the story
Has a point and ends in glory.
Literature ends when boring people die.
Filed under Poems
Modern Literature
Irritating, aggravating,
Enervating, asinine,
Childish, boorish, makes-me-snore-ish,
Meaningless but mostly fine,
Stupid, senseless, mauve, relentless,
Bleaker than “Old Yeller”,
And somehow amidst these reviews
A New York Times Bestseller…
Filed under Poems
Book Review: “The Accomplishments of Kamala Harris”
Kamala is a person
Who’s been in political office for years.
The following are her accomplishments
That distinguish her from peers:
Filed under Poems
Launch Day!
Hello dear readers!
I write you today
With a break from the “ick”
And a fair dose of “yay”.
Available now
Is my most recent book,
Selected poems on love.
Go ahead! Take a look!
It’s called “Cheaper Than Flowers”
And that is the truth.
If you order now
It will not be uncouth:
It’s a wonderful gift
For Valentine’s day
For that lover of yours
Who just won’t go away…
YA Dystopian Epics
Once upon a time
In a far away world
That turns out to be the USA by book 3
A brave young girl
With a stupid name
Becomes an unlikely hero
When she’s mildly inconvenienced
By an otherwise fine totalitarian system.
Alongside her trusty sensitive boyfriend
And the other dude who has no chance
But is still in the book for some reason
She will change the world…
Then she’ll do it again in book 2
In basically the same way
And then there’s a third one
Where the writer basically tells you
“War is bad,” or something
Because you kinda have to keep reading.
Her battle will be legendary
For about ten years
Until the next four-book trilogy releases.
Filed under Poems
Plus The One About Chocolate Slaves Murdering Lottery Winners For Their Zany CEO’s Amusement…
Children’s books today address
Bullying and gender
And how to make vegan, non-fat,
Pastrami in a blender.
Children’s books in my day
Were like “Bears go to the beach,”
And “Here’s a story ’bout some kid
“With an enormous peach.”
A Poetical Update/Cry For Help
As I was reading through my blog
Upon this snowy day
I realized there’s lots of posts
That, by default, went away.
There are two-thousand-something poems
That I’ve written on this site
And to have them be forgotten
Just really isn’t right.
I looked into solutions
But to add a button here
To send you to a random post
Costs $600 a year (Seriously WordPress? Seriously?)
So my solution to preserve
Those posts into which I put thought
Is to compile a book that’s bigger
Than the books you’ve already bought. (Hint hint)
So a thing that I am wondering
About my biggest-book-yet dream
Is whether to just compile stuff
Or whether to have a theme.
And here’s the part where you come in:
Please help me make you happy
By commenting or emailing me
Advice to make the book less crappy…
Is an omnibus of random poems
With my thoughts added enough
Or do you want a theme again
With more never-published stuff?
And if, of course, you don’t reply
I’ll just decide myself
But I’ll make the cover aubergine
So it looks weird on your shelf 🙂
Comments welcomed on the site, or emailed to thedailytravesty@yahoo.com
Filed under Poems, To the Reader
The Daily Travesty 