Tag Archives: Poetry

Another Inconvenient Truth

If you’re struggling in your career

Give Hollywood a call

Because there’s no script for a 67 movie yet

And they’ll take anything at all.

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Book Review: A Dark And Horny Knight

It’s about this guy who’s a demon

With virile and plentiful… oh lord.

I tried dear, I swear

But I really don’t dare

To review the books that have you screamin’.

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If You Know, You Know

Halloween one-shot

Playing long past 9:00 PM

My nerd social life

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Dark And Stormy Night

Samhain night, a downpour wild

Can’t douse the heart of Autumn’s child

Who dresses as their greatest fear

And walks the streets in merry cheer

Demanding sweets from passers by

Who look upon the youth and sigh

Recalling when they stood so small,

Another life, another Fall.

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Adventures in Undead Education

Little Dracula was a fool.

Little Dracula didn’t go to school.

His one weakness he could not surmount:

Little Dracula could not count.

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K-5 Education

If you could just close your mouths

And let your feet be still

Your mind would find a sense of peace

And overflow with skill.

If you could keep your eyes on me

And your hands to yourself

You’d find your time so much more free

And your talent upper shelf.

If you could focus for a blink

And persevere a while

You’d all be smarter than you think

And make a teacher smile.

And yet as you deny these things

I’m please to end a day

When you can do a two-plus-two

And know that biting’s not ok.

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Sincerely, Guys

Event people nationwide

I humbly implore you:

If you have a craft fair

You should have a gun show too

So mom can get a crocheted scarf

And dad a .22

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I’m 95% Confident

If your job includes

Subatomic particles

You may be a nerd.

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A 30-Something’s Review of Fortnite

In my day, our violent games

Were about shooting guys and taking names.

Now you skydive, camp, and swim

And randomly change from her to him,

Running from a big pink cloud

And avoiding things that are scary or loud.

When I was young, you daren’t mess up

But now I guess we get to dress up?

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Endings Are Overrated. Candles, Not So Much.

Lights are flickering.

Dire rain and wind give me

An excuse to post…

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