Childbirth is painful for women
And ball-kickage is painful for men
But after it’s done only one
Waits teo years, then says “Do it again!”
Tag Archives: Short
Golf
Little ball of plastic
I hit into a hole:
It takes me many tries
To once achieve my goal.
I then repeat the process
Seventeen more times.
This sport is very stupid
But hey, the poem rhymes!
Filed under Poems
Sometime In The 1800’s Maybe?
Once upon a time
A guy tried something new
For no reason besides
To see what stuff would do.
Afterwards he used
What he found as an appliance
And thus was born the toaster
And, with it, modern science.
Last Save: 7:59 Am -Pompeii, 79 AD…
This is the point in history
Where things aren’t going well,
But you aren’t very worried yet
Because you know a spell
That opens up a menu
Where you reload your latest save
And go back to start on easy mode
Instead of to your grave.
Filed under Poems
Researching Self-Control
If I had a potato chip
For every theory that made sense
I’d have a much larger stomach
And not a lot of evidence…
Filed under Poems
Lucky for Me… I’m a 3!
She was meretricious
And he was five-foot-two
And yet somehow between them
Amorous feelings grew.
He thought she was a goddess
And she thought he was funny.
So go the lives of 4’s and 5’s
When they have boobs or money.
Filed under Poems
But Hockey? There’s A Great Sport!
Soccer’s like “The Notebook:”
I’ve never watched for more than a minute,
I consider it nap-time
And don’t like anyone in it.
Soccer and I
Are also much alike
In that no one ever scores
And the entertainment it creates has unsatisfying conclusions.
Filed under Poems
Insurance Be Like…
I called Permanente Kaiser
‘Cause I had pain in my incisor.
What they said seemed rather ruthless:
“Pay up or you’ll soon be toothless.”
Hospital Memos
Vegetable soup will
No longer be served in the
Quadriplegic’s ward.
Filed under Poems
When You Stretch For The Pun And Hurt Yourself
I want what a former president may do
Were he a bird who saw a speck
‘Cause I don’t like the words “and a.”
I want a Bush’ll peck.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 