Women are possessed of powers
Men cannot explain
But sitting on the toilet for half an hour
Is strictly man’s domain.
Tag Archives: Short
Modern Audiences
I consider myself pretty smart
And I have an insight into art:
More people would read
Poetry if indeed
More poets would use the word “fart”
Filed under Poems
Everyone Has Something To Share
If your life is a dumpster fire
Don’t think about aiming higher
But find a cold alley
And watch how you rally
The hobos, who your heat admire.
Filed under Poems
Chess
We made a fancy board game
With alternating colored squares.
Both players have the same army
So the game will always be fair.
You win by reading the most books
About how to win the game
And memorizing how other people
Learned to not be lame.
Filed under Poems
Discipline Solution Or Future Skynet? You Decide
Some people are scared of robots
But I think we should put them in school
Because people would grow up with them
And think they’re really cool
And if a not-a-robot kid
Would give the teachers sass
It’d be just fine to get them in line
By kicking a robot’s ass.
Filed under Poems
Check The Date
I like taxes. I like Feds.
I like cold and lumpy beds.
Yes, that muumuu’s very cute.
I double-checked your parachute.
Filed under Poems
A New Perspective
I’ve started to think of ads
As memes from strangers’ dads
About brands I don’t know
And that makes me feel so
Much less like I’ve been punched in the ‘nads.
Filed under Poems
Microsoft
five years after death
my computer loads a page:
“how to download chrome”
Filed under Poems
“Award Winning” Vs. “Best Selling”
For those who want to differentiate
Between “Fiction” and “Literature”
Here’s a handy-dandy little guide:
It’s fiction if the story
Has a point and ends in glory.
Literature ends when boring people die.
Filed under Poems
Once You Hunt White Your Whole Crew Ain’t Alright
So I wrote this book called “Moby Dick”
But my publisher says its a marketing fail
So I kept the story and changed the title
And now it’s called “The White Whale”.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 