Anyone remember
When a conversation meant
You tell your partner what you like
And everywhere you went,
Your hopes and dreams and fantasies
And they reply with “K”?
You don’t, which makes me wonder
How we got to this today.
Category Archives: Poems
One More Try (Guess Who Went To A Bluegrass Show Tonight?)
I was raised out in the country
A couple miles past “out in the sticks”
And I’ve got that country talent
For meetin’ just the most unfaithful chicks;
The Jezebels and the Delilahs,
The ones who’ll love you ‘til the dawn
But when I’m done cookin’ ‘em breakfast
It’s an empty bed, and oh! My wallet’s gone!
Woe is me! Woe is I! Woah, I think I caught her eye…
What’s the harm in making one more try?
Well I’ve tried bein’ a nice guy,
Bein’ bad, and bein’ cool,
But the role I’m best at playin’
Has gotta be the damned romantic fool.
Well I keep a few reminders
Of them in my rogue’s gallery.
If I’d a dollar for each trinket
I could pay a politician’s salary.
Woe is me! Woe is I! Woke up, so I didn’t die.
What’s the harm in making one more try?
Well they’ve got these handy programs
Where women on the worldwide web‘ll
Write about how they love laughter,
Tasty food, travel, hiking, and a rebel.
Seems a shame they’d waste their effort
Fielding mail from some desperate guy
When here I am, arms and heart open
And when it ends she’ll never cry.
Woe is me! Woe is I! Woman please just hit “reply.”
What’s the harm in making one more try?
Sure, when all is done and finished
Her ego’s big and mine’s diminished,
But I keep making one more try…
Just Fine
Today I learned something
That I’d not before seen:
That someone can be “not nice”
Without being mean.
There was no sense of cruelty
In any way, shape, or form…
Just the absolute absence
Of everything warm.
If you took both the cuteness
And claws from a bear
You had basically
Who I met today there:
Something living and breathing
But someone had missed
Installing the place
Where a heart should exist.
Now I wonder whether
I’ve found something new
Or if I’ve just been sheltered
And hadn’t a clue…
Filed under Poems
Hirsute, But Not Her Suitable
There once was a man from St. Mary
Who’d be merry to marry Merry Mary.
Merry Mary, however,
Did forthrightly endeavor
Never ever to wed one so hairy.
Filed under Poems
Do Unto Others
There are two invisible powers
And both go by the name of “Love.”
Both share earthly symbols
Like a flower or a dove,
Both can feel spectacular
And to lose them feels rotten,
But only one is cherished
While the other is forgotten.
The first love, which we celebrate
Comes in many ways and rates,
Whether flourishing in one glance
Or through countless many dates.
It’s an all-consuming passion
That no drug can replicate,
Designed by God or nature
To ensure two people mate.
I prefer the second love,
Which many haven’t known,
Which can’t be felt by starry eyes
Or fire in the bone.
This love is not a feeling
But an action that we take
Not to gratify ourselves
But for another’s sake.
This second love is not reserved
For those with lovely faces.
Instead it’s most important for
Those found in darkened places,
And yet with equal vigor
To your wife and to your foe
You manifest the second love
And to both parties show.
You needn’t feel amorous
To help a stranger carry
A heavy bag, nor should you feel
Obliged to them to marry.
And yet the baffling part about
This second love these days
In when you show a person this
They’ll spurn it seven ways;
“Shee’s clingy,” or “He’s needy,”
Or “He’s trying way too hard,”
Or “He’s creepy,” or “She’s lying,
“So I must be on my guard.”
In most cases the rebuke
Is one of self-defense,
For many who show kindness
Are expecting recompense.
So when one shares the second love
For nothing but the good
It seems what was well-meaning
Is oft misunderstood.
I hope if you’re a giver
Of this secret second love,
The love for human brothers
Unconnected by their blood,
That you do not forget the gift
Or cease to feel or give,
For you’re an ever-scarcer breed
Who knows how best to live.
And if you may receive the gift
I formerly did mention
That you may understand it
As a love with good intention.
And if you’ve never thought of love
As something more than lust
I hope you read these verses
With an open mind, and trust
That if you try to love someone
For their sake, not your own,
That you will feel a universe
In which you’re less alone.
Filed under Poems
Realism and Idealism
It would be nice if living were easy.
A life without pain would be grand!
Imagine that life, so sweet and delightful,
Where nothing is worthless or bland.!
I think of that life, where perfect is doable
Then I awake with a start
And go face a day that is average and gray
But hold the dream close in my heart.
Filed under Poems
I wrote this at 8:00 AM
There once was an Airbnb
That played host to none other than me.
The wifi was slow.
Will this upload? I don’t snow…
I guess given time we will see.
Filed under Poems
IT Internships <3
Every day I help people with technical trouble,
Decked out in my polo and three-day neck stubble.
I cycle the power to show them I care
And write “Problem exists between keyboard and chair.”
Filed under Poems
It’ll Get Better Soon… Maybe (Probably Not : )
Yesterday I wrote a joke
And thought I’d write more later.
By later I had decomposed
Into a couch potater.
From the fact ai wrote “potater”
I suspect that you can see
This week has not inspired
My most vibrant artistry.
So tonight I have a fallback
That I’ve used in ages past
Where I write a bit on writing
And use words like “grand” and “vast.”
I make questionable decisions
And lines with uneven meter,
And rap up the inanity
By rhyming with saltpeter.
Filed under Poems
When The School Counselor Gives Up
Just because last time you jumped
You injured yourself in the fall
Doesn’t mean you’ll be mistaken
If you once again give it your all.
Just because last time the verdict
Did not go the way you intended
Does not mean your life will be better
If you avoid being offended.
Just because pain is eternal
Doesn’t mean you should quit having fun.
Don’t be a fool! Get up! Go to school!
And oh, by the way, here’s a gun.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 