Many a child was inspired by a flag
To leave home on a bus and return in a bag,
To struggle and clash with another boy who
Was raised by a flag without red, white, or blue.
It may be a purpose to live under fire
Until you return or in glory expire,
But I seek a purpose where no flags will fly
And a world where no child is inspired to die.
Filed under Poems
There once were two boys from Descartes
Who possessed pure and beautiful hearts
Until one rainy day
In a childish way
They learned how to bottle their farts…
Filed under Poems
Part of making art
Is having sincere belief
That your crap is gold.
Filed under Poems
There once was a D&D game
Hosted by this poet, the same.
It ended quite late
With most epic of fates
But as consequence this poem is lame.
Filed under Poems
Pizza’s pretty yummy
And hot dogs taste real nice
But I can do without the carbs
And even sans the spice.
Instead of all that bready stuff
What I really want to eat
Is meat covered in melted cheese
Then covered in even more meat!
Filed under Poems
I watched “Everything Everywhere All At Once”
And all I can think about now
Is that a movie that makes less sense than my poems
Won seven Oscars somehow…
Filed under Poems
If I could name a river after myself
I think I’d call it “David River”
‘Cause that’s a limitation
Of the whole “name-it-after-yourself” deal.
If I could name a city after myself
I can probably guess your IQ
By what you thought the answer would be.
It would be New David River City
Because duh.
Filed under Poems
Sometimes all it takes
To make somebody’s day
Is to flash a cheerful smile
And whisper “Hip hip hooray!”
I tried it out this afternoon
And the data that I got was this:
Prison is not a good place to test
A cheerfulness hypothesis.
Filed under Poems
Today it is early.
Last night it was late.
Does my lack of a poem
Mean I had a good date?
Filed under Poems
Perhaps if people possessing purple percherons
Prepared their persons patiently
Purple percherons put in purses
Would prudently pursue purer pursuits?
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 