Ten years ago today
We saw a theatrical trailer
For what history may call
The biggest cinematic failure:
A lifeless Star Wars reboot
That exceeded our most cynical fears.
Now come back and read this poem
In another couple of years.
Tag Archives: Bad
You’ve Got Fail
Microsoft had a Magic 8-Ball
And shook it every day
To get ideas for products
Based on what it had to say.
For Word, the ball said “Signs point to yes.”
For Powerpoint, it said “You should.”
But the message they most took to heart
Was “Outlook not so good.”
Filed under Poems
Choice of the FedEx Driver
I could park my truck
And walk up to the house
And place a package on the door
Or hand it to a spouse.
I also have the option
To relive my high school ways
And chuck a 40-yard touchdown
With whatever peasants buy these days…
Filed under Poems
Golfing
One under is a birdie.
An even score is par.
One over is a bogey.
What I got is a Zanzibar.
Filed under Poems
Meaning? Maybe. Rhymes? Absolutely!
There once was a dame with no name
Who spent days playing a lame game.
Her tame claim to fame came
When her aim to blame the same game
Overcame her shame of being no-name.
Filed under Poems
Songwriting Tip #5678
If your chorus is just one sentence
Repeated exactly four times
That song isn’t actually music
And one day you’ll pay for your crimes.
Filed under Poems
Bille Nye The Science Guy 3, Starring Chris Rock
We’ve finally reached the place
Where Hollywood’s gotten so mid
Black actors are turning down starring roles
And bringing milk home for their kid.
Filed under Poems
P. Diddy? More Like R. Chaic! (Gregorian Ba Dum Tss)
I suspect between 476-1450 AD
The pedophiles cried and raged
Because even the youngest of children
Were all still middle aged.
Filed under Poems
New Slogan Unlocked?
I’m not too good at poetry
So instead of trying to push
I’ve decided to stop my poetry
And just write poebush.
Filed under Poems
The Poetical Political Spectrum Test
The Left
If your daughter tells you “Mother
“I am actually your son”
Then tell him that’s amazing
And he’s still your favorite one.
The Right
If she says she wants testosterone
Tell her she’s testost-on-her-own.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 