He was born a maggot
And he grew into a fly
Until my cat got hold of him
And then he had to die.
We celebrate his passing
With a vigorous fist bump
For he reminded us our fat cat
Can manage still to jump.
Tag Archives: Life
When You’re 29 And Your Brain Ain’t Like It Used To Be
Some like it hot.
Some like it cold.
Some start their poem with the same cliche two days in a row
Because hey, I’m tired and old.
Filed under Poems
Hands First Or Balls First?
There are two types of bathers
That I have come upon:
The type who take the bar of soap
And rub, rub, rub it on
And the type who see the bar of soap
And never, ever use it
‘Cause they know the other bather
And how often they abuse it.
Filed under Poems
But… The Metaphors?
“This movie is great, I promise”.
Those were the words I said.
Then I remembered that one scene
Where they shot the dude in the head
And the bit with the serial killer
And the… actually, never mind.
Maybe next time we’ll watch a movie
That you happen to find.
Filed under Poems
Oh Wait… That’s Youtube
Instead of another reality show
Where half-naked people live in the wood
A show where people make huge pillow forts
Would do us a whole lot of good.
Filed under Poems
Hard Times Make Good Complainers… Good Complainers Make Good Comedy
Say what you will about hard times and such
But I am certain about this much:
When everything’s bad, we have more variety
Of things to go off on when we lose our sobriety.
Filed under Poems
Rainy Parking Lot
Little drops of ocean sky
Fall upon my Honda’s hood.
I am warm and dry inside,
Content and sleepy. Life is good.
The raindrops play their glassy drum;
None of them would e’er predict
The mayhem that my wiper blades
Will, on their zen, so soon inflict.
Filed under Poems
The Superbowl… Biden Vs. Trump… Yeah, We’re In A Loop
The groundhog saw his shadow
And the Summer’s coming soon.
Now we have another choice:
Giant meteor or typhoon?
Filed under Poems
A Winter Drive Haiku
Twinkling blacktop ice
Gleams like diamonds. I turn right
But my car goes left.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 