There once was a Valentine’s Day
When I wasn’t alone (it’s today)
But I lacked the foresight
To post a poem before tonight
So here you go. Now go away!
Tag Archives: Limerick
State of the Union Reaction
I think everything should be free
‘Cause I saw a speech on TV.
I’m glad that the rich
Agree they’re our bitch
And they’ll buy my whole wishlist for me!
Filed under Poems
But Which Has More Hot Air
There once was a balloon from China
That flew over North Carolina.
Some guy shot it down
And earned more renown
Than president Joe the Mangina.
Filed under Poems
The Fantasy World Has More Normal Names For Its Cities
There once were some nerds from Puyallup
That imagined some monsters to wallop.
They played D&D
‘Til they passed level 3
And yes, that’s an actual place… Puyallup.
Filed under Poems
I Must Join Her, Salient Rhymes Be Damned!
There once was a beautiful woman
Who was my most favoritest human.
She needed to shower
And late was the hour
So I must do what I must be doin’.
Filed under Poems
Phoning This One In…
There once was a phone with low battery
That I tried to charge with some flattery.
I said, “Hey there Samsung.
“You look very well hung.”
But it died and now I can’t be chattery.
Filed under Poems
Seriously, His Timing Was Impeccable
There once was a beloved cat
Who thought it appropriate that
In a moment of passion
It would be in fashion
To smother my face with its fat.
Filed under Poems
Psychiatrists Might Call This “A Cry For Help”
There once was a homicidal maniac
Who like to hold poets hostage.
He may not understand rhyming
But as long as I keep writing
He won’t turn me into bolognese sauce…
Filed under Poems
Back To Normal
I went on a trip for 5 days
And I’m grateful in so many ways
To be home once again
Where in peace I can pen
Five-line poems that fail to amaze
Filed under Poems
IRS? More Like IQ-0
There once was a federal agency
Who knew how much taxes you owed, you see,
But when you didn’t pay enough
‘Cause math is hard and stuff
They need a whole department to audit ye?
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 