If you want to have world peace
And have all wars be ended
All you need to do is kill
The folks who get offended
Because if no one ever
Is upset by what gets said
No one will think, “That’s mean
“And so let’s make that person dead.”
Instead the only people
Still alive can speak their mind
And no one says “Let’s murder them
“‘Cause they mocked my behind.”
We’d live in perfect harmony
In lands of dance and song,
And if such genocide offends you
Then I dare you: Prove me wrong.
Filed under Poems
I think Albino representation
Is what modern Hollywood lacks.
After all, if there are no albinos
What roles will Netflix give the blacks?
Filed under Poems
In the future we will have peace
Just so long as we silence everyone
Who says we’re like Nazis
Because Nazis lost
And losing is for people who work
And have independent thought.
Also, Jews hurt the economy.
Filed under Poems
I gave a presentation
About a prehistoric human
But when my speech was finished
My audience was fumin’.
A reporter stood and said “Hello,
“My name is Molly Kerrigan.
“There’s no such thing as cavemen.
“They’re Subterranean Americans.”
Filed under Poems
For those who aren’t aware,
Jail and prison are not the same.
To help remember which is which
You can play this little game:
If you piss off any cop
You’ll go to a jail cell.
If you’re either poor or black
You’ll go to prison as well.
Filed under Poems
If you’re like me and I’m like you
You hear a lot about LGBTQ,
Perhaps even about BIPOC,
But never about SPWCOV.
Now it’s important to tolerate
Those who are gay, lesbian, trans,
And those who are bisexual
And whatever it is for which “Q” stands,
It’s important to have empathy
And remember the plights
Of those who are indigenous
And all the other non-whites,
And women deserve a mention
So the feminists can’t fine us…
But what about the Straight People
Without Color Or Vaginas?
Filed under Poems
Nothing like the NFL
To use their helmets to tell
That the one-percent lacks
Empathy for the blacks
And are violent towards them as well.
Filed under Poems
I don’t get why some folks don’t like me.
I do all the things that they say
Like supporting the wenches and slant-eyes and injuns
And even my cousin who’s gay.
I don’t get why people think I am offensive
When all thems is stupid and fat.
I guess they must envy my skills in the kitchen…
Those Jews don’t know how to cook rat!
Filed under Poems
She drove like she was asian.
She swam like she was black.
She jumped like a caucasian
With a dolphin on her back.
She wasn’t good at anything;
If she tried, she’d fail
But she was still ten-times better
Than every straight white male.
Filed under Poems
Once upon a time
There was a tiny little rock
Who was the world’s preeminent scholar
On the early works of Bach.
The little rock was erudite
Yet its career went South
On account of probably white people
And, also, its lack of mouth.
——————————————————–
Once upon a time
A woman majored in STEM
And made millions teaching women
The ways that men were bad to them.
She could have been an engineer
And done science and stuff
But instead she told the patriarchs
She wasn’t paid enough.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 