We made a fancy board game
With alternating colored squares.
Both players have the same army
So the game will always be fair.
You win by reading the most books
About how to win the game
And memorizing how other people
Learned to not be lame.
Tag Archives: Short
Discipline Solution Or Future Skynet? You Decide
Some people are scared of robots
But I think we should put them in school
Because people would grow up with them
And think they’re really cool
And if a not-a-robot kid
Would give the teachers sass
It’d be just fine to get them in line
By kicking a robot’s ass.
Filed under Poems
Check The Date
I like taxes. I like Feds.
I like cold and lumpy beds.
Yes, that muumuu’s very cute.
I double-checked your parachute.
Filed under Poems
A New Perspective
I’ve started to think of ads
As memes from strangers’ dads
About brands I don’t know
And that makes me feel so
Much less like I’ve been punched in the ‘nads.
Filed under Poems
Microsoft
five years after death
my computer loads a page:
“how to download chrome”
Filed under Poems
“Award Winning” Vs. “Best Selling”
For those who want to differentiate
Between “Fiction” and “Literature”
Here’s a handy-dandy little guide:
It’s fiction if the story
Has a point and ends in glory.
Literature ends when boring people die.
Filed under Poems
Once You Hunt White Your Whole Crew Ain’t Alright
So I wrote this book called “Moby Dick”
But my publisher says its a marketing fail
So I kept the story and changed the title
And now it’s called “The White Whale”.
Filed under Poems
Late Night?
Growing up is when you play
D&D 12 hours a day.
Being an adult is when your Bard
Says “It’s 9:00 guys. We worked too hard.”
Filed under Poems
ADHD
I’m an absent-minded guy
And I’d probably make a terrible spy.
On an unrelated note
I mowed the lawn and bought a boat.
Filed under Poems
Another Unifying Political Policy… Almost
I think most people are open
To human sacrifice. However
We disagree on who gets picked
And who will pull the lever.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 