I wonder if the island folks,
The island dames and island blokes,
Get upset when coconuts
Breastfeed their kids out of their cocohuts.
Yes, I’m tired. Liking my posts helps me sleep. You know you want to…
Tag Archives: Silly
Box Office 2020
Hollywood makes movies,
Then they make sequels,
Then they remake them,
And then they make prequels.
That’s how it goes
According to me
So here are some prequels
That I’d like to see:
Schindler’s College-Ruled Notebook;
Leon: The Trainee;
The Lambs Being Noisy;
American History V;
Reservoir Puppies;
Work-Visa Kane:
Wall-D; The Fifth Sense;
Wayne’s Global-Domination Campaign;
The Accelerating and Cranky;
“No Thanks, I Just Ate” Games;
Dragon Ball Y;
“No Bail For Me” James;
2000: Just Earth;
And last but not least:
“Be-Careful-Who-You-Call-Ugly-In-Middle-School” and the Beast.
Filed under Poems
Transcript of the new Daily Travesty Audiobook
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……………………Oh, you mean out loud?
Filed under Poems
You’re A Grand Wizard Harry
If all white people are racists
And support the KKK
It makes me see Hagrid
In an entirely new way.
Filed under Poems
It’s Awkward When Someone Says “Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace”
When a man has nothing to say
He waits in silence for the silence to end.
When a girl I like has nothing to say
She says “That’s so nice, but I have a boyfriend.”
Filed under Poems
Better Than A Polygraph
They say you can spot a killer
Or persons of criminal ilk
By offering them cocoa puffs.
(Run if they pour out the milk).
Filed under Poems
Life’s Hard Questions
If you gave a guy from Zimbabwe
A billion dollars cash
He could buy a whole lot of cattle
And a man with a lot of cattle is rich,
But if you give an American guy
A billion dollars worth of cattle
He can send his enemies cow poop
For the rest of his life,
So who’s the real winner?
Filed under Poems
This Gender-Swap BS Is Making Me Thor
When I hear Disney the Almighty
Makes a movie about Aphrodite
And Tom Selleck’s the star
(And it isn’t subpar)
Then I’ll sigh and perhaps say alrighty.”
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If I want to be Samuel L. Jackson
For Halloween, I cannot.
I can’t on the basis
That blackface is racist,
Or at least that is what I was taught.
But when Marvel takes a Norse God
And make him a random white chick
That’s not a slight
‘Cause he’s already white
And why can’t a Norse God lack a dick?
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When someone signals virtue
But obviously have none
Why don’t we call their bluff?
I know I have had enough.
Signed, a white guy with a gun.
Filed under Poems
This Poem > Green New Deal
Onions are the only things
That make their murderers cry.
We should all wear clothes made of onions
And all murder would go bye-bye.
Filed under Poems
The Occult Circa 2019
If you give a million tiny dollars
To a your own voodoo doll
Do you get full sized money?
To try, give me a call!
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 