Tag Archives: Silly

April 23, 2020 · 2:16 pm

Man’s Best Friend Meets “The Man”

I was running with my dog

One Wednesday afternoon

When my puppy’s nose did spy

Malodorous raccoon.

Not the type to laugh at fate

My dog took up the chase.

Going zero to sixty in 3.2,

He should’ve won the race.

Alas, he turned a corner

Onto Lincoln Parkway South…

A german shepherd police dog

With radar gun in mouth!

I figured it was funny

Knowing the dog had snatched the gun

But funnier was how my pup

Went sixty to zero in 2.1

We got off with a growl,

The raccoon nowhere in sight.

I guess I should be grateful

That my puppy’s fur is white!

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April 19, 2020 · 3:59 pm

Kindness

I offered a homeless guy a place

To sleep under my roof.

He said to me, “I’m not a ceiling fan.”

Then to himself: “Lol, what a goof!”

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April 18, 2020 · 1:30 pm

LGBTQ, Not 10JQKA

I like to play poker with drag queens

‘Cause whenever they draw an ace

You know right away

‘Cause you know what they say:

They struggle to keep a straight face.

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April 17, 2020 · 12:44 pm

Sacrifice

She had wavy golden hair

That fell below her knees

The color of the summer sun

And lighter than a breeze.

She cut it when we married,

Though it was at my behest:

The hair would have been lovely

If it weren’t on her chest.

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April 11, 2020 · 4:28 pm

Suffice To Say, He Did Not Have The Last Word

There once was a poet named

Whose brilliance was greater than.

By leaving off the last

He got around the whole

And never again worried about.

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March 24, 2020 · 5:38 pm

If You Don’t Think This Poem Is Ironic, You’re Part Of The Problem

There’s no place for intolerance

Among people I know.

If you’re someone intolerant

Then you had better go.

Intolerance is evil

And if you disagree

Then you should be ashamed

And also learn to think like me!

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March 15, 2020 · 10:41 pm

Some Jobs Can’t Catch A Break…

Where I live in Washington

The schools are shutting down.

The restaurants are closing

All across my little town.

Musicians, actors, dancers

Have no place to ply their trade

And artists cannot show their work

And therefor can’t get paid.

Amidst setbacks and panic

There’s a cloud with a silver-line:

Though you cannot learn or act

Or dance or sing or dine

There is no ban on poetry

Being posted on the net;

Thus why I’m still writing at 10:39.

Is this virus over yet?

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March 12, 2020 · 9:37 am

Different Blokes

Steve and Sharocco are tigers

But they are not alike.

Steve enjoys a day at the spa;

Sharocco likes to hike.

Steve likes Bob Ross videos;

Sharocco likes to knit.

But both love eating human flesh

So along they somehow get.

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March 8, 2020 · 1:12 pm

Now You Know Why!

I was a cock a huntin’

For a wily, free-range hen

I needed a set of wheels

That appealed to chicks, so then

I went to get a car loan

And I jumped through a hoop.

Now I’m clucking happy

Crossing the road in my chicken coupe.

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March 5, 2020 · 8:59 am

A Sense of Scale

Some people say a football player

Is really, really large.

What’s bigger than a football player

Is probably a barge.

What’s bigger than a barge

Is a thousand-trillion ants.

Nothing bigger than that

Exists outside my pants.

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